The Best Jack Plotnick Quotes

Tanner: I'm home. And when the baby comes, we're gonna be a family again.

Brett: [Last words, said to Lisbon] Tiger, tiger.

Tanner: I really wish you hadn't seen that.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Guys, something's wrong. The umbilical cord's wrapped around the baby's throat.
Hannah: No.
Tanner: What?
Derek: Well, Reid, do something.
Dr. Spencer Reid: I need something to cut the cord with, quickly.
Tanner: [hands scissors to Reid] Use these.

Mayor: Do you like "Family Circus"?
Mr. Trick: I like "Marmaduke".
Mayor: Oh! Eww! He's always on the furniture. Unsanitary.
Mr. Trick: Nobody tells Marmaduke what to do. That's my kinda dog.
Deputy: I like to read "Cathy".

Patrick: How long until you're done with forensics and you pull this guy out of here?
Brett: Delicate job. Uh, we'll be out of here by tomorrow morning, probably.
[seeing Jane staring at him]
Brett: Something wrong?
Patrick: Wrong?
Brett: You've been really sullen with me recently, and now you're staring at me strangely and I don't know why.

Patrick: You know what your problem is, my friend? You enjoy your work a little too much. You're a ghoul. If you don't get horny reading Fangoria, I'm Britney Spears.
Brett: I - I resent that!
Teresa: This is you trying to redeem yourself, is it?
Patrick: I'm sorry. He irks me. He's irksome.