The Best Mike Miller Quotes

Skyler: Look, I-I've never stolen anything in my life. All right? I-I told you, that tiara was a gift. A baby shower gift.
Jewelry: So who gave it to you, then?
Skyler: I don't think I have to tell you that.
Jewelry: Ma'am, you don't have to tell me anything. You can talk to the police. And I can tell them how my daughter-in-law remembers showing this particular item to a tall blond woman, who, when her back was turned, walked right out the door with it. So there.
Skyler: Oh, yeah? Well, then, I can talk to the Channel 3 News. Yeah, I can tell them you people, without a shred - without a-a modicum of evidence, illegally detained an innocent pregnant woman in a dank storeroom.
Jewelry: This is my office.
Skyler: I feel I'm being held hostage. Furthermore, I'm not getting enough air back here. I don't think... I don't think I can breathe. Oh, my... oh, my god. Oh, no. I'm going into labor. Yes, I...
[she groans, and begins feigning Lamaze breathing; cut to her leaving the store and dialing her phone]
Marie: Hi, you've reached Marie. Do the beep thing.
Skyler: Marie, it's Skyler. I just left Zachary's. I need to talk to you. *Immediately*.