The Best Sandra Bernhard Quotes

Max: Well, if she's fired, then I'm fired too.
Joedth: Oh, relax, Norma Rae!

Carolyn: [Amanda and Carolyn enter as Duncan and Terence are fighting] Are you fighting over me?
Duncan: [hiding sword] No.
Terence: Yes!
[attacking Duncan]
Terence: You can't have her!
Duncan: I don't want her!

Carolyn: What does man need most?
[Duncan and Amanda look at her]
Carolyn: Besides that... heroes. And if there aren't any, man creates them. Duncan MacLeod exists because we need him to.
Amanda: So you don't think it's the same guy?
Carolyn: Are you nuts? He'd have to be immortal.

Joedth: If Martin Scorsese walks in here do you want him to sit himself? He'll be lost. Lost!

Joedth: [Repeated line] Customers like that. I don't, but they do.