The Best That '70s Show, Season 1, Episode 23 Quotes

[to Red]
Jackie: I'm really sorry your Mom died. It's like... sad and stuff.

- one of you better take that roast out of the oven, or there will be hell to pay.
- Sit down, Eric.
- Don't drink that.
- Put it on your eye.
- Come on, I'm kidding!

[Eric showing Red and Kitty Grandma Forman's dead body in the Vista Cruiser]
Reginald: Okay, here's the part where I get lost. How did she hit the sidewalk?
Eric: She fell over when I opened the door.
Reginald: *And what was going through your head when you did that?*
Kitty: Oh, sure. Yell at him, Red. It's not like he's going through enough seeing his dead grandmother.
Reginald: Eric, take your mother in the house. She's hysterical.

Steven: Red, I'm sorry about your Mom and I'm sorry Kelso's an idiot.

[Red is seen from the point of view of Grandma Forman in her coffin]
Reginald: Well, Ma, I... Oh, for God's sake!
Funeral: Oh, sorry. Those should be closed.
[the funeral director closes Grandma Forman's eyes]

Fez: Mister Red, always remember: a mother's goodness is carried on forever by her sons.
[Marty starts to cry]
Reginald: Have you met my sister, Marty?

- Dad, um, the last thing
- I said to her was, "it wouldn't kill you to be nice."
- But I think it did, because she died.
- That could only happen to you, son!
- It's okay.
- I know.

Eric: I killed her. She was old, and the shock of her grandson telling her that she was nasty killed her.
Donna: Have you talked to Red about this?
Eric: I'm not talking to my Dad about this! Do you remember how angry he got when I didn't rake the yard? And this is like, twice as bad.

[Eric talks to his Grandma]
Eric: I don't think being nice for a whole day would kill you.
[Grandma falls over and dies]

Steven: Hey, Forman, you have any naked pictures of your Grandma?
Eric: [shocked] No!
Steven: [hands him a box of old photography supplies and laughs diabolically] You do now!

- You're very nasty.
- And I don't see why you have to be so hateful.
- I don't think being nice for a whole day would kill you.
- Grandma?
- Grandma?
- Oh... oh, no!

- Then I'll keep them.
- Fine. Go ahead and keep 'em.
- I don't want the damn things!
- Kitty...
- You go in there and tell that bastard to give me my trains!
- Red... it's your problem.
- I gotta make a pie.

- Eric, you're in shock.
- You have to go inside and tell red right now, right now!
- Wait, um...
- Will you do it?
- Please! Right now!
- I forgot the tupperware.

- You just take your mother in the house.
- Mom.
- Well, th-this is...
- This is a terrible loss.
- Mom, didn't you just say that she was evil?
- I never said any such thing.
- Okay.

Kitty: Now, Red, honey, I-I don't think that you're really mad at Marty. I think you are just going through one of the five stages of dealing with death.
Reginald: What are you talking about?
Kitty: There are five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.
Reginald: I have two stages: anger and drinking.