The Best That '70s Show, Season 4, Episode 4 Quotes

Michael: Oh, I hope I win this van. I really need a place to do it with Jackie.

Donna: Hey, what are you doing tonight?
Melissa: This is Wisconsin, so... nothing.

- Well, I... Okay, I don't know if you realize this, but all this talk about water is really making me have to go pee.
- Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm sorry.
- Yeah, I can see that
- "urine" a lot of pain.
- Yeah, well, you better shut up,
- 'cause you're gonna have to go, too.
- That's where you're wrong.
- I am going.

- What? Man, you sit around and talk about me?
- Is that what's going on?
- Look, I don't want your help.
- I give and I do, and I do and I give.
- And for what? For nothing.
- Well, I'm done. Go.
- But, Fez...
- I said, go.

- You're not leaving already, are you?
- Uh, no, I came out to get some fresh air.
- It's, uh... It's fresher out here, the air.
- I like air. How about you?
- Air's okay.
- You know what's really good?
- Water.
- That's really...

Red: There's something you should know: when used separately, women and alcohol can be a lot of fun. But, put together, they can make you a dumbass!

- joy or despair, pleasure or pain, life or death.
- I am Daniel!
- And I cannot be beaten.
- Look at what I brought.

- You took your hand off the van. You lose.
- This isn't over.
- It is, for you.
- Get out of here.
- And so begins the battle of wits.
- Oh, man,
- I've never been good at wits.
- Really?

- Oh.
- You poor thing.
- You know, you have these sad lips that are just so hot.
- Really?
- I may not be popular, but if given the chance,
- I'll put out something fierce.

Kitty: Pssst! Pssst! How's it going?
[the party for Hyde]
Jackie: Great! At first I was thinking of wearing my hair up, but it's one of my top five features, so... voila!

Jackie: I am so disgusted!
[Over Eric's behavior]
Melissa: I know - there are WAY too many girls at this party! I can't even smell my own perfume!
Jackie: Well, you're the only one.
[Looks around]
Jackie: You may not even the prettiest girl here..
Melissa: You shut your hole!