The Best That '70s Show, Season 8, Episode 13 Quotes

Jackie: Fez, why are you lying to her? You didn't go out last night; you were lying in front of the TV, trying to look up Victoria Principal's dress.

- Look, I like Hilary, and I was afraid that if she knew the real Fez that she wouldn't like me, so I created a new Fez.
- A better Fez.
- I call this Fez "Work Fez."
- You should see me down there.
- Okay, let's do this!

- ♪ Yo, they say this cat Fez is a bad mother...
- ♪ Shut your mouth
- ♪ I'm talking about Fez
- ♪ And we can dig it
- ♪ He's a complicated man and no one understands him but his woman
- ♪ Work Fez ♪

Hilary: [to Jackie] How would YOU know? Wait, have you guys dated?
Jackie: Ew, no! We're just roommates.
Hilary: Fez, you told me you had your own place! You called it the Feznasium...

- ♪ We did last week
- ♪ Not a thing to do
- ♪ But talk to you
- ♪ We're all all right
- ♪ We're all all right ♪
- Hello, Wisconsin!

Kitty: Well, we're off to buy curtains for Eric's room. We're making it into a sewing area, so I thought a nice floral print might really pretty it up.
Reginald: It's all part of our plan to make Eric's room less girlie.
Fez: I wanted to make my room more manly, so I put up some posters of the Village People. Mission accomplished!

- and I didn't know what you'd think.
- I'm happy for you.
- Yeah, man, whatever.
- Yeah, I think it's great.
- I mean, you finally found a guy who is stronger than you, and that's hard to do.
- Okay, great! Cool, now we can all hang out and it won't be awkward.

- Okay. Great. So let's just, you know, take it slow and see where it goes.
- I'm cool with that,
- Poopchute Sally.
- Shut up.
- Oh, my God!
- In Eric's bedroom?
- You two-timing whore!

- Uh, Fez, why are you lying to her?
- Shh!
- But you didn't go out last night.
- You were lying in front of the TV trying to look up Victoria Principal's dress.
- Don't you have some hair to sweep, sweep-up girl?
- Huh? No. The place is clean.

Jackie: [to Donna and Randy] So, have you guys had sex yet?
Donna: [outraged] Jackie!
Steven: My money's on "no". Donna is a strong, independent woman who feels that men should respect women for their minds. In other words, she's a big, fat tease.
Fez: Well, I think it's going to happen soon, because normally, Donna only shaves her legs up to her knees. But this morning, she went all the way from Miami to Jacksonville.

Jackie: Fez, why did you lie to her? You didn't go out last night, you just lay in front of the TV, trying to look up Victoria Principal's skirt!