The Best The Big Bang Theory, Season 2, Episode 23 Quotes

Sheldon: Did Han Solo give up when Luke was lying in the frozen planet of Hoth? No! He slit open a tauntaun and used its internal body heat to keep warm.
Howard: You heard the man. Hold him down while I cut him open.

[a comment Penny made has given Leonard second thoughts about going on the Arctic expedition]
Sheldon: Her missing you is an emotional state you find desirable.
Leonard: Yes, obviously.
Sheldon: All right. Well, given that missing you is predicated on you leaving, logic dictates you must leave.
Leonard: Yes, okay, but I'm gonna be gone for three months. What if she doesn't miss me that long and she meets someone else?
Sheldon: She does have a short attention span.

Leonard: [Corrects chart] There. How's that.
Sheldon: You actually had it right the first time. Once again, you have fallen for one of my classic pranks. Bazinga!

Rajesh: I'm a Hindu. My religion says that if we suffer in this life, we are rewarded in the next. Three months in the North Pole with Sheldon, and I'm reincarnated as a well-hung millionaire with wings.

Penny: Have a safe trip. Goodbye.
[closing the door]
Penny: It means I wish you weren't going.

Sheldon: Leonard, you may be right. It appears that Penny secretly wants you in her life in a very intimate and carnal fashion.
Leonard: You really think so?
Sheldon: Of course not. Even in my sleep-deprived state, I've managed to pull off another one of my classic pranks... Bazinga.

Penny: Well, I got you a little going away present.
Leonard: Oh, a blanket.
Penny: Oh, no, no, no, not just a blanket. See, it has sleeves. Yeah! So, you can, you know, be all snoodled up while you do your science stuff.
Leonard: Oh, wow, cool.
Penny: Oh, I'm gonna miss you.
[Long hug]
Penny: See you later.

Leonard: Sheldon, what are the words I can say right now to end this conversation and let me go back to sleep?
Sheldon: Odd. President Seibert posed the exact same question.
Leonard: How was it resolved?
Sheldon: It wasn't. His wife set their dogs on me and rendered the question moot..

Sheldon: I'm at the horns of a dilemma. Can you imagine me, Sheldon Cooper, at the North Pole?
Leonard: Easy peasy. I'm doing it right now.

Leonard: Dinner's ready.
Sheldon: What are we having?
Leonard: Reconstituted Thai food.
Sheldon: Did you bring the dehydrated low-sodium soy sauce?
Leonard: Check.
Sheldon: Freeze-dried spicy mustard?
Leonard: Check.
Sheldon: Flash-frozen brown rice, not white?
Leonard: Uh, oh, sorry.
Sheldon: Not to worry. I hid it. Bazinga!

Sheldon: You're in my spot.
Howard: [to Rajesh] There's not time for a crossbow. Get me an icicle.

- Leonard, I don't know what to tell you.
- It was just a hug.
- Glad we cleared that up.
- Yeah.
- I guess I'll see you.
- Okay.
- Have a safe trip.
- Thank you.
- Bye.
- Okay, bye.
- It means I wish you weren't going.

Sheldon: I'm a theoretical physicist. A career I chose in no small part because it's indoors. But if I'm able to detect slow-moving magnetic monopoles there, I will be the scientist who confirmed string theory. And people will write books about me. Third graders will create macaroni-art dioramas depicting scenes from my life.

- Check.
- And flash-frozen brown rice, not white?
- Uh, oh. Sorry.
- Not to worry.
- Buzzinga.
- You're in my spot.
- There's no time for a crossbow, find me an icicle.
Sheldon: Three months. This is gonna be great.

Howard: Just imagine, if he accepts the offer, we could have an entire summer without Sheldon.
Rajesh: We could play outside.
Howard: We could sit on the left side of the couch.
Leonard: I could use the bathroom at 8:20.
Rajesh: Our dreams are small, aren't they?

Mrs. Koothrappali: I told you, no. Why don't you believe me?
Debbie: 'Cause it doesn't make sense to me. How can it be that in the entire country of India, there isn't one Outback Steakhouse?

Sheldon: Oh, boy.
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: I can't comment without violating our agreement that I don't criticize your work.
Leonard: Then what was "Oh, boy"?
Sheldon: Great restraint on my part.

- A little bit.
- Two for two. I'm on fire.
- She's not my girlfriend but wouldn't you think she'd feel a little bad...
- That I'm gonna be gone for the whole summer?
- That feels like a bonus question.
- I'm gonna stop here while I'm ahead but I've had a great time.

Leonard: [At the North Pole] Darn it!
Howard: What?
Leonard: We're out of ice.

Sheldon: Howard, you will be practicing precision on the classic children's game Operation. You shall start by... removing the funny bone for $200.
Howard: And to think I went to MIT for this.

Leonard: She didn't seem that upset that I was going.
Sheldon: No. Did you think she was upset?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Oh, good. I got one right. Are you upset?
Leonard: A little.
Sheldon: Two for two. I'm on fire.
Leonard: I know she's not my girlfriend or anything, but don't you think she'd feel a little bad that I'd be gone for the whole summer?
Sheldon: That feels like a bonus question. I'm going to stop right here and say I've had a great time.

Rajesh: What are you working on?
Howard: Crossbow.

Howard: We're not really gonna go to the North Pole with him, are we?
Sheldon: I'm still within earshot. You might want to wait for my bedroom door to close.
[sound of Sheldon's door closing]
Howard: We're not really gonna go to the North Pole with him, are we?

Leonard: Wait a minute! He offered to send you to the North Pole?
Sheldon: Yes. In fact, he was quite enthusiastic. He said "frankly, if I could send you tonight, I would."

Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny
Penny: [knock, knock, knock] Sheldon
[Sheldon is startled]
Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny
Penny: [knock, knock, knock] Sheldon
Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny
Penny: [knock, knock, knock] Sheldon
Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny
Penny: [knock, knock, knock] Sheldon
Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny
Penny: [knock, knock, knock] Sheldon
Sheldon: [knock, knock, knock] Penny!
Penny: What do you want?

- That's 14 hours away.
- For the next 840 minutes, I'm effectively one of Heisenberg's particles.
- I know where I am or how fast I'm going, but I can't know both.
- Yet how am I supposed to carry on...
- With this huge annoying thing hovering over my head?
- Yeah, I know the feeling.

Mrs. Koothrappali: If your friends all jumped into the Bay of Bengal and tried to swim to Sri Lanka, would you do it?
Rajesh: If you were behind me nagging, I would.

Penny: Oh, Leonard, what time is it?
Leonard: It's 7 a.m. I'm sorry it's early, but we're leaving soon, and I needed to talk to you.
Penny: Okay.
Leonard: What did you mean when you said you're going to miss me?
Penny: Um, I don't know. You'll be gone and I'll notice.
Leonard: Okay, well, um, what about this? What does this mean?
Penny: Wine, credit card and late night television are a bad combination.
Leonard: All right, fine. What about that really long hug? What did that mean?
Penny: That wasn't a long hug.
Leonard: It was at least five Mississippis. A standard hug is two Mississippis tops.
Penny: Leonard, I don't know what to tell you. It was just a hug.
Leonard: Glad we cleared that up.
Penny: Yeah.
Sheldon: I guess I'll see you.
Penny: Okay, have a safe trip.
Leonard: Thank you. Bye.
Penny: Okay, bye.
[Behind her door]
Penny: Means I wish you weren't going.

Penny: Sheldon says you're going to the North Pole.
Leonard: Yeah. Pretty cool, huh?
Penny: Yeah. I'm just a little surprised you didn't tell me.
Leonard: Oh, well, it all happened kind of fast, and we had to get physicals and buy thermal underwear and study up on, you know, snow and stuff. Sorry, I was gonna tell you.
Penny: Oh, hey, no, you don't have to apologize. There's no reason you have to tell me. I was just, you know, surprised.

Leonard: Sheldon, can I talk to you for a minute?
Sheldon: [waking up] I want another cookie, Meemaw.
Leonard: It's just me
Sheldon: But Meemaw was just making cookies.