The Best The Big Bang Theory, Season 7, Episode 21 Quotes

Sheldon: Alright, alright, I'll shake the brain bush one more time, see what falls out.

- Hello. I didn't expect you this evening.
- Well, I was just feeling so bad about lying to you the other night,
- I... wanted to make it up to you.
- And how do you propose to do that?
- Unless you have gravity on blu-ray under that skirt,
- I don't know where you're going with this.

Raj: You're a good friend. I owe you one.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Howard! Help me get out of the tub!
[Howard looks at Raj]
Raj: Not that one.

Sheldon: What can we do that's fun?
Leonard: What can we do that's different?
Penny: What can we do that's free?

Sheldon: So, we're just randomly choosing a restaurant without researching it online?
Penny: Yup.
Sheldon: Great. See, this is how Anything-Can-Happen Thursday turns into It-Won't-Stop-Coming-Up Friday.
Leonard: Hey, how about that Asian fusion place?
Sheldon: Fusion *and* Asians? I'm trying not to think about science.

Penny: Hey, maybe the answer to your career question is in one of these
[fortune cookies]
Penny: .
Sheldon: Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter if you're in a pinch.

Sheldon: Have you ever paid for a meal?
Penny: Not with money.

Raj: Why does Emily like this stuff? Do you think there's something psychologically wrong with her?
Howard: What difference does it make?
Raj: What do you mean?
Howard: Oh come on, she could have a freezer full of ex-boyfriend's body parts and you'd still go out with her.
Raj: I do like that the ex-boyfriend's out of the picture.

- Come on, Sheldon.
- What do you say?
- All right. I officially reinstate anything can happen Thursday.
- Great! What do you want to do?
- I don't know.
- What do you want to do?
- I don't know.
- What do you want to do?
- I'm starting to remember the problem with anything can happen Thursdays.

Amy: I'm sorry. I just needed a break from hearing you obsess about what to do after string theory.
Bernadette: I kinda wanted one night where we didn't have to hear about how miserable you were making this movie.
Amy: None of that means we don't love you.
Penny,31182: I don't complain that much about the movie, have I?
Leonard: I also love you.

Leonard: She got Sheldon to go to a psychic with her.
Amy: Psychic? He considers them not just mumbo jumbo, but extra jumbo mumbo jumbo.

Sheldon: [to the psychic] You know what this is? Yeah, and I reserve this word for those rare instances when it's *truly* deserved. This is malarkey.
[he storms out]
Penny: Wow, you really struck a nerve. I've never heard him use the 'M' word before.

Penny: [Reads her fortune cookie] "People turn to you for guidance and wisdom." That's a good one.
Sheldon: No, it's not. Turn to you for guidance and wisdom? That cookie is clearly mocking you. You'd never get that kind of sass from a Nutter Butter.
Penny: Since you're paying for dinner, I'll let that slide.
[Gives Sheldon a cookie]
Penny: Read.
Sheldon: Have you ever paid for a meal?
Penny: Not with money. Read.
Sheldon: [Reads] "Your warm and fun-loving nature delights those around you."
Penny: Nope, try again.

Raj: Why can't I be in a relationship with a girl who likes Sound of Music?
Howard: Raj, you are the girl in the relationship who likes Sound of Music.

Raj: I was thinking we could watch a DVD.
Howard: Well, my mother doesn't have a lot of choices. Unless you want to watch a video of her colonoscopy. Spoiler alert: twenty minutes in, they find a prune pit.

Sheldon: If I want to waste my time on nonsense, I follow Leonard on Instagram.

Sheldon: I don't mean to be rude or discourteous, but before we begin, I'd just like to say there is absolutely no scientific evidence to support clairvoyance of any kind. Which means again, no insult intended, that you're a fraud, your profession is a swindle and your livelihood is depended upon the gullibility of stupid people. But again, no offense.
Penny: Sheldon, ask your question.
Sheldon: OK, I just did. What was it?
Penny: Oh, for God sakes. Look he's a physicist who trying to figure out what his next field of study should be.
Sheldon: For your information I was asking her about the next Star Trek movie.
Penny: I can answer that one. I'll be bored.
Ms. Davora: All right. Why don't we begin? Your spirit guide is telling me that there's a woman in your life that you're having problems with.
Sheldon: That's an easy guess. I'm a clearly annoying person and have problems with both genders.
Ms. Davora: I know. You clearly are. But I'm seeing a specific woman that you're in a romantic relationship with.
Penny: Oh, oh. Here we go.
Sheldon: The majority of people have dark hair. Even you at one time.
Ms. Davora: Does she work in a similar field to you?
Sheldon: Ha. The opposite. She's a neurobiologist, I'm a theoretical physicist. My spirit guide can go suck an egg.
Ms. Davora: They're telling me that you have difficulty being close with her.
Penny: Oh, he does. He so does. What should he do?
Ms. Davora: He should give himself to this relationship. Once he does all his other pursuits will come into focus.
Penny: Sheldon, did you hear that? Amy is the key to your happiness.
Ms. Davora: Exactly. Personally and professionally everything will fall into place once you commit to her.
Sheldon: You know what this is? Yeah, and I reserve this word for those rare instances when it is truly deserved. This is malarkey.
Penny: Wow. You really struck a nerve. I've never heard him use the M word before.

- Clearly, that cookie is mocking you.
- You'd never hear that kind of sass from a nutter butter.
- Since you're paying for dinner,
- I'll let that slide. Open yours.
- Have you ever paid for a meal?
- Not with money. Read.
- "Your warm and fun-loving nature delights those around you."
- Oh, try again.

Sheldon: There's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo.

[first lines]
Penny: So, we're about to shoot this scene in a movie where the killer ape DNA is slowly taking over my body.
Leonard: Okay.
Penny: But I realize they're gluing fur everywhere except my cleavage. So, I ask the director why and he says it's important for the story that my boobs be the last things to turn ape.
Leonard: It's sweet that he thinks there's a story.
Penny: Oh, and there's not even a bathroom on set. I have to go to the gas station across the street. I mean, I was dressed like half an ape and still not even close to the most disgusting person in there.

Sheldon: Uh...
Penny: What's wrong?
Sheldon: I don't understand my food. It's Chinese noodles, Korean barbecue, and a taco.
Penny: It's fusion.
Sheldon: My mother would lock her car doors if she had to drive through this hodgepodge of ethnicity.

Penny: [Sees Amy and Bernadette at a cafe] Son of a bitch! Bernadette isn't working late!
Sheldon: And Amy doesn't look sick.
Penny: Why would they lie to us?
Sheldon: I don't know.
[Knock-knock-knock]
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette.
[knock-knock-knock]
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette.
[knock-knock-knock]
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette. Why would you lie to us?

[last lines]
Sheldon: Hello. I didn't expect you this evening.
Amy: Well, I was just feeling so bad about lying to you the other night, I... wanted to make it up to you.
Sheldon: And how do you propose to do that?
[Amy drops her coat to the floor, showing she is wearing a Catholic schoolgirl outfit]
Sheldon: Now, unless you have Gravity on Blu-ray under that skirt, I don't know where you're going with this.

Amy: Once in a while, I get a little jealous of how close Penny and Sheldon are... I mean, not in a romantic way. It's just, she really has some sort of connection with him.
Leonard: Well... Well, they've known each other a long time, and Penny grew up around horses, so she knows how to approach him without making him skittish.

Amy: I feel so bad about lying to Sheldon. How am I going to make it up to him?
Bernadette: I'll tell you what I'd do with Howard, but I don't think dressing up like a Catholic school girl is going to work with Sheldon.
[Amy stares off into the distance]
Leonard: He'd probably give you homework.

Raj: [pauses movie] Okay, so in the last twenty minutes we've seen a crazy woman kiss a fetus in a jar, a man cut in half and sewn to a fish...
Howard: The dismemberment of a rotisserie chicken by my mother. On the plus side, I don't think she saw the film.

- Not at all.
- Thank you.
- But to be fair, when you talk, most of what you say sounds like,
- "wah, wah, wah, clothes.
- Wah, wah, wah."
- Hey, I don't understand why you're not upset with Amy.
- I am. So much so that
- I'm gonna bring her here for dinner on our next date night.

- I wonder that too.
- Then why do you watch these things?
- Can I tell you something without you judging me?
- Sure.
- They kind of turn me on.
- And play.

Sheldon: Amy's sick.
Leonard: Aw, what's wrong with her?
Sheldon: Well, she talks a lot. She always wants to hold hands.
Leonard: That's not what I meant.
Sheldon: If you were refering to her illness, you should have asked "What ails her?"
Leonard: What ails her?
Sheldon: Oh, who knows.

Raj: Here we go. 'House of 1000 Corpses'.
Emily: Now, just so you know, I was a nanny for three years, so if you get scared I can totally change your diaper.
Raj: Actually, I have to tell you something. These kind of movies really aren't my thing, so... last night I watched it, just to see what I was getting myself into.
Emily: Okay...
Raj: And I have to be honest; I thought it was disturbing and weird. And it made me wonder what it says about someone who enjoys it.
Emily: I wonder that too.
Raj: Then, why do you watch these things?
Emily: Can I tell you something without you judging me?
Raj: Sure.
Emily: They kinda turn me on.
Raj: And play.

- We're gonna have anything can happen Thursday.
- You're gonna tell me all about your science stuff and I'm gonna complain about my movie, and we're gonna support each other because that's what friends do.
- Okay.
- If I had to pick now,
- I'd probably go with dark matter...
- Shut up.

Penny: Sheldon, what did we say about being a nicer friend?
Leonard: Thank you.
Penny: Leonard, what did we say about being a gullible weenie?

Bernadette: I gotta go. Penny ratted me out.
[to Howard]
Bernadette: FYI she's getting you a watch for your birthday with money she took out of your wallet.