Top 30 Quotes From Matthew Hollis

Matthew: Maybe we ought to talk about boys.
Nicole: Boys?
Matthew: Ground rules.
Jennifer: That's if we get any boys on the ground.

Matthew: This is crazy.
Jennifer: Crazy wonderful! Crazy's the best!
Matthew: I'm too old for crazy. Can't we settle for silly?

Matthew: Wake up Jennifer. You fell asleep. You've been dreaming. You had a very bad dream.
Jennifer: That we were making love?
Matthew: Probably. Yes! Probably. That was it.
Jennifer: How would you know?
Matthew: I must have had the same dream, too.
Jennifer: Don't feel guilty.
Matthew: I don't know what to feel.
Jennifer: I'm ready for another dream if you are.

Matthew: You're not going to leave Jennifer alone here, are you?
Victor: Why? You coming with me?
Matthew: No. No.
Victor: Well, then, you'll babysit. If she misbehaves, I want you to put her over your knee, okay?

Victor: Ah-ha. You got milk all over your whiskers, pussycat. Who was the lucky girl? Where'd you meet her?
Matthew: I didn't meet anybody.
Victor: Okay, okay, we'll talk at breakfast. I want to know all the details about it. We can start at the bottom if you like.

Victor: "Poor bastard", huh? If I ever get my hands on him, I'll beat him to death, that'll unconfuse him.
Matthew: A beating is not the way, my friend.
Eduardo: He's right, you know?
Matthew: Personally, I prefer torture.

Karen: Haven't you said that there were times you'd rather be without me?
Matthew: Ah, that's only when I'm with you. Most of the time, we're too together. Sometimes, we're so us, I forget what its like just to be me! But, when we're apart, I miss you terribly.

Matthew: Jennifer, about last night...
Jennifer: Kiss me first.
Matthew: Kiss you? I ought to spank you!
Jennifer: Oh, please, and bite me too.

Matthew: I was wrong. You're never too old to be crazy.

Victor: What do you want?
Matthew: There's no other bed. Bastard.
Victor: Prick!
Matthew: And to think I said I love you.
Victor: To who?
Matthew: To you!

Matthew: It was the night of the wedding.
Victor: Romance was in the air.
Matthew: Birds. Music. Dancing. Drums. Everything was.
Victor: Blame it on Rio, eh?

Matthew: One time a company I worked for transferred me to an island in the Pacific. Fantastic place. I invited my girl to visit me. I sent her a postcard everyday with a single word on each card. I wrote "Found a virgin paradise. It's yours. Matthew." Narturally, they were delivered in the wrong order. The message she got was "Found a virgin. It's paradise. Yours, Matthew." I never heard from her again.

Victor: They smiled. Maybe we should talk to them.
Matthew: We can't. They're practically naked.
Victor: Try to picture them with clothes on.

Nicole: I'm no longer a carnivore. I don't eat anything that's ever had parents.
Matthew: We have artichokes, they're orphans.

Matthew: Do you miss me at all?
Karen: At all? Yes dear, I miss you at all.

Jennifer: Poor Daddy!
Matthew: Oh, yours or Nicole's?
Jennifer: Mine.
Matthew: Oh, that poor daddy. You can't swing a dead cat around here without hitting a poor daddy.

Jennifer: [about Bernardo] He's nineteen, is that what you had in mind?
Matthew: Nineteen is perfect. I've been nineteen a couple of times myself.

Jennifer: Make love to me.
Matthew: I'm twenty years older than you.
Jennifer: Twenty-eight.
Matthew: Twenty-five.
[Jennifer takes out her retainer. Mathew and Jennifer kiss]

Victor: [Matthew is about to leave] You can't.
Matthew: No, I'll, I'll be back but I have to go first.

Matthew: I was just remembering the first time I kissed you. It was at your Christening. Your mother was powdering your bottom - and I said I wanted to be the first man to kiss it. And I leaned over and I did.
Jennifer: How dare you drive a tiny baby *wild* with desire.

Nicole: She's in love, you know?
Matthew: She thinks so.
Nicole: If you think so, you are.

Jennifer: Come on, the beat's wonderful.
Matthew: No, it's just that I can't do any kind of dancing where you have to use your body.

Matthew: [about their daughters] They'll be all right. They're good girls.
Victor: Yeah. Let's go find some bad ones.

Matthew: It was, quite simply, the worst night of my life, my embarrassment compounded by the fact that Victor had now slept with two out of the three members of my family.

Jennifer: Will you forget me?
Matthew: The minute I die.

Jennifer: You should wear your hair like this.
Matthew: What time is it?
Jennifer: About one. I like it like this. Makes you look older.
Matthew: [looks at his watch] It's almost three.
Jennifer: Pretend it's one...

Matthew: It doesn't matter now. But, when you're my age, do you know what I'll be?
Jennifer: Dead, I suppose.
Matthew: Dead and a half.

Matthew: [Jennifer had given him a small Tiki love-god idol on a necklace.] It was just what I needed: a one-inch god with a two-inch penis.

Eduardo: Hello. Hello.
Victor: Hi!
Eduardo: [his English is not so good.] How nice. You are buying groceries together. You are, how you say, the Queer Couple?
Matthew: [referring to the name of the TV series] The Odd Couple. Odd.

Matthew: Sleeping with someone else's wife doesn't count, is that it?
Victor: At least your wife isn't anybody's daughter.