The Best Greg Lawson Quotes

Sheriff: I'll swing by, make sure that cat of yours gets fed.
Nicole: She doesn't really like men.
Sheriff: Well, who does?

Sheriff: Earp, you may be the hero that Purgatory deserves. You're just not the one it needs right now.
Wynonna: Big Batman fan, huh?
Sheriff: Hell, no. When that franchise lost Uma Thurman they lost Randy Nedley for good.
Wynonna: You truly are a monster.

Nicole: I am so sorry that I spent the last year and a half trying to kill you.
Sheriff: Well, to be fair, I was a puffball monster. And I did eat several people's pets.

Nicole: Well, I'm sheriff emeritus.
Sheriff: Sheriff avoidus, is more like it.

Nicole: I need booze!
Sheriff: You look like you need an ambulance.