The Best Gilderoy Lockhart Quotes

Gilderoy: Let's have a volunteer pair. Potter, Weasley, how about you?
Professor: Weasley's wand causes devastation with the simplest spells. We'll be sending Potter to the hospital wing in a matchbox.

Gilderoy: [they find the Basilisk skin] What's this?
Gilderoy: It looks like a... snake.
Harry: It's a snake *skin*.
Ron: Bloody hell. Whatever shed this must be 60 feet long, or *more*.
Ron: [Lockhart passes out]
[to Harry, sarcastically]
Ron: Heart of a lion, this one.
Gilderoy: [to Harry and Ron after grabbing Ron's wand] The adventure ends here, boys. But don't fret. The world will know our story. How I was too late to save the girl. How you two tragically lost your minds at the sight of her mangled body.
[points wand to Harry]
Gilderoy: So... you first, Mr. Potter. Say goodbye to your memories. Obliviate!
[he gets pulled backwards and thrown hit into a rock wall knocking him out which causes loose rocks to fall and block the path between Ron and Harry]
Ron: Harry!
Harry: Ron! Are you okay?
Ron: I'm fine.
Gilderoy: Hello. Who are you?
Ron: Um... Ron Weasley.
Gilderoy: Really! And, uh, wh-who am I?
Ron: [to Harry] Lockhart's memory charm backfired! He hasn't got a clue who he is!
Gilderoy: [he picks up a rock] It's an odd sort of place, this, isn't it? Do you live here?
Ron: No.
Gilderoy: Really?
[Ron knocks Lockhart unconscious with the rock]
Ron: [to Harry who's on the other side of the rockslide] What do I do now?
Harry: You wait here and try and shift some of this rock so we can get back through. I'll go on and find Ginny.
Ron: Okay.

[after the attack on Mrs. Norris]
Professor: If I might, Headmaster. Perhaps Potter and his friends were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. However, the circumstances are suspicious. I, for one, don't recall seeing Potter at dinner.
Gilderoy: I'm afraid that's my doing, Severus. You see, Harry was helping me answer my fan mail.

Gilderoy: [whilst flying out of the Chamber of Secrets with Fawkes, Harry, Ron, and Ginny] AMAZING! This is just like magic!

[after using a spell to mend Harry's broken arm, Lockhart inadvertently removes all the bones in it]
Gilderoy: Ah... yes, well, that can sometimes happen. Um, but, uh, the point is, uh, you can no longer feel any pain. And, very clearly, the bones are not broken.
Hagrid: Broken? There's no bones left!
Gilderoy: Much more flexible, though.