The Best Johnny Quid Quotes

Johnny: Why are you talking to the Pipe, Roman? You're madder than I am.

Johnny: [Archie has Johnnie Quid by his lapels and backed up against the wall] Don't hurt me, Arch... I'm only little!

Johnny: Did he ever interfere with you? You know, touch you inappropriately?
Pete: He tickled me, if that's what you mean.
Johnny: You see in psychological circles there's a technical term for that scenario.
Pete: There is?
Johnny: Monsteroustickalotis.
Pete: You what?
Johnny: Your dad was a tickling monster.

Johnny: No need to worry just yet, boys. They're not going to do it while we're standing in the lift. Because then they'd have to carry the corpses to the cars, and that seems too much like hard work. In about two minutes there, Danny boy there is gonna turn and pop me two in the head, then one in the throat just to be sure. You shouldn't have brought me here, fellas, you're just going to end up as witnesses. Once they've "dealt" with us, they will put our corpses in the boot of a stolen car, then pour six gallons of petrol on the car. I'll let your imagination do the rest. Now, Danny boy here is rattled, because he knows that you know. And so, he's going to fight.
[Danny turns, but a forewarned Mickey and Roman manage to kill him and his friend]
Johnny: Pass me the gun, Mickey. Quickly. QUICKLY! Don't worry, he can't defend himself, he's got no head!

Old: [Johnny Quid takes Old Man's drink and swigs] Oi, that's my drink.
Pete: Fuck you, sing-along.
[Johnny Quid gives the Old Man the finger]
Pete: You're no help, and stop calling me Pedro.
[Old Man grabs bottle to fight]
Johnny: [Johnny Quid turns to face him, crazy-eyed] Come on then, boy. I'll have you and your girlfriends. I'll do the lot of yas.
[Johnny Quid points a sharpened pencil at the Old Man]
Johnny: Do I not look like a pothouse? Six foot down the bar. Go on, jog on, walk on, goodbye, bon voyage, fuck off.
[Group of old men turn away]
Johnny: Was I good or what, Pete?
Pete: Yeah.
Johnny: It's all in the eyes. Junkies, I shit them.

Johnny: That, Roman and Mickey, is the famous Archie Slap.

[Archie brings a gift for Johnny]
Archie: I know how much you like the art, Johnny boy, so I thought it'd look good on your wall.
Johnny: Someone's been telling you stories, Archie. Now that must have been expensive.
Archie: As it happens, it did cost a very wealthy Russian an arm and a leg.

[after seeing Lenny Cole in a wheelchair for the first time]
Johnny: Daddy! Nice wheels!

Johnny: You see that pack of Virginia killing sticks on the end of the piano?
Pete: Yes.
Johnny: All you need to know about life is retained in those four walls. You will notice that one of your personalities is seduced by the illusions of grandeur: the gold packet of king-size with a regal insignia, an attractive implication towards glamour and wealth, the subtle suggestion that cigarettes are indeed your royal and loyal friends - and that, Pete, is a lie. Your other personality is trying to draw your attention to the flip side of the discussion: written in boring bold black and white, it's a statement that these neat little soldiers of death are in fact trying to kill you - and that, Pete, is the truth. Oh, beauty is a beguiling call to death and I'm addicted to the sweet pitch of its siren. That that starts sweet ends bitter, and that which starts bitter ends sweet. THAT is why you and I love the drugs and that is also why I cannot give that painting back. Now please, pass me a light.
Pete: Oh, you are something special, Mr. Johnny Quid.

Pete: I'm sorry. I thought you might've liked a bit of company.
Johnny: I'm dead, Pete. What does that tell you? It tells you that dead people don't like company.

[last lines]
Archie: I see your music's back in the charts.
Johnny: That was when I was a RocknRolla.
Archie: Well, what are you going to be now, John?
Johnny: You wanna watch out, 'cause I'm gonna be just like you, uncle. Now, I'm gonna be a REAL RocknRolla.