The Best Eddie Devon Quotes

Eddie: [runs into the courtroom] I feel great!
Christine: [jumps out of her chair] AAAAAAAHHHH!
[Everyone stares at her]
Christine: [faking nonchalance] Oh, look who's here.

Eddie: [Eddie is giving away everything he owns] Okay, I've got a shopping center.
[Everyone jumps up excited]
Eddie: It's in Milwaukee.
[Everyone sits down dejected]

Eddie: Oh, by the way Dr. Melnick. I kept all the Swiss bank accounts. I mean I may be stupid... but I'm not crazy.

[Eddie is about to throw himself down the elevator shaft - for the second time]
Eddie: [to Melnick] So, you live with this, you scum! AAAAHHHH...!
[Harry, Christine and Melnick scream as Eddie jumps down - about 3 feet]
Eddie: Surprise. I'm standing on top of the elevator.
Dr. Charles Melnick: [collapsed on the floor, holding his chest] I... want... you... dead.
Eddie: [jumps back to the floor] Why? You said I have so much to live for.
[to Harry and Christine]
Eddie: So what do you think, guys? My first joke.
Judge Harry T. Stone: [sagging against the wall] It killed me.