The Best Mindy St. Claire Quotes

Mindy St. Claire: Sorry about before, one of the perks of living alone is that I get to just walk around naked.
Eleanor: My kind of gal... and I gotta say, you keep it 'toight'.
Mindy St. Claire: Oh, that is the nicest , and only thing, anyone has said to me in 30 years.

Eleanor: So... you go back to your old life, chill with your floating Derek head, and when Tahani gets certified, you enter the system. Tahani designs your test. Deal?
Mindy St. Claire: Why not? Something new.
[pause]
Mindy St. Claire: Thanks for giving a crap about me. I don't really give a crap about myself, so it's nice that someone does. I'm really glad I filmed you having sex.
Eleanor: [smiles] Me, too.

Mindy St. Claire: You always end up going back. I mean, sometimes you go back because you feel bad your friends don't know what you know. Sometimes you go back because you walk in on me while I'm masturbating, and sometimes you go back because I walk in on you while I'm masturbating. But no matter what, you always go back.

Eleanor: I've only ever said "I love you" to two men my entire life. Stone Cold Steve Austin, and a guy in a dark club who I mistook for Stone Cold Steve Austin. I mean, why would you show me that?
Mindy St. Claire: I don't know. You guys are, like, trapped here together. I feel bad. You know, I'm rooting for you guys.
Eleanor: No, this is no "us guys". We basically just met each other.
Mindy St. Claire: No, Eleanor. You guys have known each other a really long time. Also, it doesn't matter if I told you that or not, because when Michael finds out he's failed again, he'll just reboot you.
Eleanor: Chidi, Janet, we're leaving!
[taking the tape from the VCR]
Eleanor: I am taking this with me.
Mindy St. Claire: [sarcastic] Oh, no. It's my only copy. Don't.

Eleanor: How many times have Chidi and I slept together?
Mindy St. Claire: Eight different days, but, like, twenty different sessions.
Eleanor: And how many times did we say... that stuff?
Mindy St. Claire: Oh, only once. Oh, God, I hated it. It, like, really killed the vibe for me. See, after I watched the porno I made starring you, I watched you talk about your feelings to cool down. It's like anti-porn.

Mindy St. Claire: Do you have anything I can snort, like a crushed-up aspirin, or some eye shadow, or cocaine?