Top 50 Quotes From Sheriff Harry S. Truman

Dale: Who's the lady with the log?
Sheriff: We call her the Log Lady.

Special: Did you kill Laura Palmer?
[Leland, as Bob, hoots and yells like a wolf]
Leland: [in Bob's voice] That's a "yes".
Special: How about Maddy Ferguson?
Leland: What do you think?
Special: I'm asking you.
Leland: No really, what do you think?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Answer the question.
Leland: Well, yeah gee wiz, I guess I kinda, sorta did. I have this thing for knifes. Just like what happended to you that time in Pittsburgh, Cooper!

Sheriff: I've had just about enough of you and your insults!
Albert: Oh yeah? Well, I've had about enough of this small town filled with morons and half wits, dolts, dunces, dullards and dumbbells... and you... you chowder-head yokel, you blithering hayseed. You've had enough of me?
Sheriff: Yes, I have.
[Truman punches Albert in the face]

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: What is it, Coop?
Special: Oh, just thinking about Annie Blackburn.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Well bless your heart, I've never known your mind to wander.
Special: Ah, Harry, I've been feeling this way all day. You know, I proceed as usual, my mind clear and focussed, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, I see her face and I hear her voice. Naturally I try to reorient myself, come back to the task at hand, but the image remains. Sometimes I actually feel dizzy.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: A man in love is supposed to feel that way.
Special: Well my symptoms suggest the onset of malaria, but I've never felt better in my life.

DEA: I understand we're both staying at the Great Northern. How's the food up there?
Dale: Dennis, you're in for a big surprise.
Sheriff: So are they.

Dale: Laura Palmer's murder was vicious and calculated. There's no telling what we'll encounter, bringing a suspect to ground. After Andy's mishap at the motel, I wanna make absolutely certain each of us is comfortable and confident with our firearms.
Deputy: Nice piece.
Dale: Actually, it's standard issue. I made a few modifications. How long has Lucy been upset with Andy?
Sheriff: Body language?
Dale: In this case, it was yelling through a megaphone.

Pete: Oh dear. Lucy? Lucy, this is Pete Martell. Lucy, put Harry on the horn.
Lucy: Sheriff, it's Pete Martell up at the mill. Uh, I'm going to transfer it to the phone on the table by the red chair. The red chair against the wall. The little table with lamp on it. The lamp we moved from the corner? The black phone, not the brown phone.
Sheriff: Morning, Pete. Harry.
Pete: She's dead, wrapped in plastic.

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Cooper, I need to ask you a favor.
Special: Harry, let's get one thing straight. I work for you now. You say drink coffee, I'll drink coffee.

[Ben is held in custody]
Jerry: Now your 24 hours are up! You either charge my client or let him go.
Sheriff: Ben Horne, I'm charging you with the murder of Laura Palmer.
Benjamin: Good move, Jer.

Sheriff: Your brother hasn't been to work for the past few days. Where is he?
Bernard: I don't know. He got personal business elsewhere.
Sheriff: Who else is he dealing drugs with?
Bernard: Why don't you ask him yourself? He will be at the Roadhouse tonight.
Sheriff: He's coming to work at the Roadhouse tonight?
Bernard: Yes. He's the bartender, isn't he?
Dale: Wait a minute here. Bernard, we have you tied to a chair. You're mixed up with your brother, Jacques, in a wide variety of felonies. What I want to know is why in the world would you tell us where and when to find him?

Dale: [after interviewing Josie Packard] So, Harry, how long you been seeing her?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: How did you know?
Dale: Body language.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: [pause] Jeez, Louise.

[first lines]
FBI: The short answer is, this is the work of the same ghoul who killed Laura. More fan mail: the letter 'O' under Maddy's ring fingernail. There were strands of fur clutched in her right hand.
Special: What kind of fur?
FBI: White fox. The strands were laced with formaldehyde. A dead animal, stuffed.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I'll make phone calls. Leland will know how to get ahold of Maddy's family.
Special: Harry, don't make any calls. I need 24 hours.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: For what?
Special: To finish this.

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I'll assign a couple of my deputies to the house 24 hours a day.
Bobby: Hey man, I can take care if Shelly, alright? You just save the deputies.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Bobby Briggs... button it.

Sheriff: Lucy, you better bring Agent Cooper up to date.
Lucy: Leo Johnson was shot, Jacques Renault was strangled, the mill burned, Shelly and Pete got smoke inhalation, Catherine and Josie are missing, Nadine is in a coma from taking sleeping pills.
Dale: How long have I been out?

Deputy: [Dale and Harry are investigating a cabin in the woods as Andy covers them from the outside. He observes a car pulling up and several FBI agents, including Albert Rosenfield, emerge] Harry! You know who it is?
Dale: [Inside] What's that?
Deputy: It's Andy, seems pretty upset about something.
Deputy: Harry! It's Agent Rosenflower!
Deputy: [He runs toward the cabin, stepping on a loose board on the landing, which flies up and strikes him in the face. Dale and Harry emerge from the cabin]
Sheriff: Andy, are you all right?
Deputy: [Andy stumbles around on bowed legs, trying to regain his balance]
Albert: And it's another great moment in law enforcement history!

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I suppose you want me to follow them at a discreet distance.
FBI: Harry, you're all right.

[Lucy is watching "Invitation To Love"]
Sheriff: Morning Lucy, what's going on?
Lucy: Er... thanks to Jade, Jared decided not to kill himself, and he's changed his will leaving the Towers to Jade instead of Emerald, but Emerald found out about it, and now she's trying to seduce Chet to give her the new will so that she can destroy it; Montana's planning to kill Jared at midnight so the Towers will belong to Emerald and Montana, but I think she's going to double-cross him and he doesn't know it yet. Poor Chet.
Sheriff: What's going on *here*?

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Why would Eckhardt want me dead?
Dale: Sexual jealousy.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Oh yeah.

Harry: Do you think they spotted us?
Cooper: Give me a donut.

[about a dream he had of Laura Palmer]
Dale: She whispered to me who killed her
Sheriff: Well, what did she say?
Dale: You know... I don't remember.

FBI: Sheriff Truman, would you sit down? We'd like to ask you a few questions.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I'll stand.
FBI: Well, let me begin by saying that whatever Agent Cooper is guilty of will not be held against you. And your cooperation will be useful and greatly appreciated.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: If I understand the law correctly, you need extradtion papers in order to get a statement from me, Mountie King. And you need a subpoena from a judge, Agent Hardy. Now, unless you gentlemen have that paperwork, I suggest you take your cooperation and stuff it.
FBI: [firm tone] That attitude will not serve you, or Agent Cooper.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: That's not an attitude. That's a promise. Agent Cooper is the finest lawman I've ever known. I've had nothing but respect for him since he arrived in Twin Peaks. Now, I don't know what information or evidence you have against Agent Cooper or where you got it from, but it is dead wrong.
FBI: [cold tone] Thank you for your time.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Help yourself to a coffee on your way out.

FBI: Sheriff, that reminds me. Can you recommend to me a good, inexpensive hotel or motel? Now it doesn't have to be fancy and I mean that.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I can get you a good rate up at the Great Northern.
FBI: Because you know, I think I'm going to be here for some time, and these motels, they'll promise you a good rate and when you get there it's a whole different story. Now all I need is a bed, a bathroom, a telephone, and sometimes a television in the unlikely event that one day I'll get a chance to knock off early.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I can get you a good rate up at the Great Northern.
FBI: Sold. Well, tomorrow comes early.

FBI: Sheriff, what kind of fantastic trees have you got growing around here? Big, majestic.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Douglas firs.
FBI: [Marveling] Douglas firs...

Deputy: Sheriff Truman? Sheriff Truman?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Andy! Over here!
[Andy runs over]
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Been about 10 hours since he went in there.
Deputy: Do you want a thermos of coffee?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Yeah.
Deputy: Do you want a plate special?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Yeah.
Deputy: Do you want dessert?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Yeah.
Deputy: Do you want pie?
[Harry doesn't answer]
Deputy: Harry? Harry?

Dale: Ask me why I'm whittling.
Sheriff: I give up. Why are you whittling?
Dale: Because that's what you do in a town where a yellow light still means slow down, not go faster.

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: There's a sort of evil out there. Something very, very strange in these old woods. Call it what you want. A darkness, a presence. It takes many forms but... its been out there for as long as anyone can remember and we've always been here to fight it.

Mayor: [Mayor Dwayne Milford is threatening to shoot Lana and Dr. Jacoby] Don't anybody move.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Mr. Mayor - put the gun down!
Mayor: Anybody moves and I'll blast her into kingdom come!
[Points to Dr. Jacoby]
Mayor: And the hippie too!

Jerry: Sheriff, your 24 hours are up. I demand you to arrest my client or release him!
Sheriff: Ben Horne, you are under arrest for the murder of Laura Palmer.
Ben: Great move, Jer.

Sheriff: Jelly donuts?
Dale: Harry, that goes without saying.

Sheriff: There's a sort of evil out there. Something very, very strange in these old woods. Call it what you want. A darkness, a presence. It takes many forms but... its been out there for as long as anyone can remember and we've always been here to fight it.

Sheriff: Lucy, you better bring Agent Cooper up to date.
Lucy: Leo Johnson was shot, Jacques Renault was strangled, the mill burned, Shelly and Pete got smoke inhalation, Catherine and Josie are missing, Nadine is in a coma from taking sleeping pills.
Dale: How long have I been out?
Dr. Will Hayward: It's 7:45 in the morning. We haven't had this much action in one night since the Elks Club fire of '59.

Catherine: Hello Harry.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Forgive my saying so Catherine, but aren't you dead?

Special: Harry, what's on your mind?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: I'm worried about Josie. She's been really afraid.
Special: About what?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Ben Horne and Catherine Martell. They've been seeing each other on the sides, it's been going on for years. Josie just found out. She thinks that they are planning to burn down the sawmill, and somehow get rid of her too.
Special: Do you belive her?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Well... I know that Ben Horne wants that land around the sawmill for Ghostwood Developments, and Josie won't sell. So, yeah. I believe her.
Special: Well, how much do you know about her? Where she's from? Who she was before she came to Twin Peaks?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: What are you getting at?
Special: The truth Harry. Because that's my job.

Dale: Did you ever sell drugs to Laura Palmer?
Bernard: I don't sell drugs.
Sheriff: How much did Jacques pay you to be the mule?
Bernard: Jacques don't pay me anything. I'm no mule!
Sheriff: Oh, so that ounce of cocaine that we found on you is... let me guess: yours for personal use?
Bernard: Yeah, that's right.
Dale: Then I guess you don't get much sleep at night, Bernie.

Albert: Oh yeah, well I've had about enough of morons and half wits, dolts, dunces, dullards and dumbbells... and you, you chowder-head yokel, you blithering hayseed. You've had enough of me?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Yes I have.
[punches Albert in the face]

FBI: [he enters sanding a handcarved wooden whistle] Hi, Mike, Bobby. Now before we get started, have you two fellas got your stories straight?
Bobby: If we tell the truth we don't have to get our stories straight.
Mike: Besides, the sheriff told us we're just in here for fighting and, uh, it was self-defense.
FBI: Right. Well, I guess you can go then.
Bobby: Now?
FBI: Mm-hm.
[as Mike and Bobby walk to the door, Cooper toots his whistle]
FBI: Oh, fellas, one more thing. Pray for the health and safety of James Hurley, because if anything happens to him, I'm coming for you.
[Mike and Bobby leave]
FBI: Sheriff, what are you sitting around for? We've got places to go and people to see.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: You know, I think I'd better start studying medicine.
FBI: And why is that?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Because I'm beginning to feel a bit like Dr. Watson.

Special: [very serious] Fellas, let's stand together for a moment. It's time I mentioned something. Now, I'm not sure, but I believe I was visited by a giant. Twice. In my room. He left me three clues. The first had to do with Jacques Renault in a body bag. It came true almost immediately. The second was, "The owls are not what they seem." The third was about a man who points without chemicals.
Sheriff: [perplexed] You were visited... by a giant?
Special: [nods yes]
FBI: Any relation to the dwarf?

Deputy: We're holding up, for now.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Hey, you and Cooper can handle it. It's a pretty simple town. Used to be. I guess the world's just caught up to us.

Sheriff: Morning, Leo.
Leo: [hostile and beligerent tone] Who the hell is he?
Sheriff: This is Special Agent Cooper, FBI. He's investigating the murder of Laura Palmer. He'd like to ask you a couple of questions.
Leo: So ask!
Dale: Leo... is that short for Leonard?
Leo: That's a question?

Special: R, B, T. Harry, I believe that these letters and the Giant's clues are in some way related to this long-haired man. Mrs. Palmer saw him in a vision. She called this morning to say that Maddy had seen the man twice in the past two days, both times in a vision. I've seen him in my dreams.
Sheriff: And Ronette.
Special: She saw him physically at the train car.
Sheriff: Right.
Special: Four of us have seen him in different forms. This path is a psychic link that will lead us straight to him.
Sheriff: So, what did this giant sound like? I mean, did he have a big, blooming voice or what?
Special: No, no. He spoke softly, distinctly.
FBI: And you gave him the beans you were supposed to use to buy a cow?
Special: No, Albert, I gave him my ring.

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: This is Special Agent Dale Cooper.
Dr. Lawrence Jacoby: [He removes an earplug] Gary Cooper?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Agent Cooper.

FBI: I think I saw a cottontail rabbit!
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: It must have been a snowshoe rabbit.
FBI: Snowshoe?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Right.
FBI: Snowshoe. Snowshoe rabbit.

[of Jacques Renault]
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Do you believe him?
Special: He's too stupid to lie.

FBI: You know why I'm whittling?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Okay, I'll, I'll bite again. Why are you whittling?
FBI: Because that's what you do in a town where a yellow light still means slow down, not speed up.

James: Harry, Laura talks on her tape about a mystery man.
Sheriff: The red Corvette. Leo Johnson.
James: I think it was somebody else. Not Jacques Renault either.
Sheriff: Why do you say that?
James: I never put it together until I heard the tape. Where she says, "This guy can really light my fire." Well, I remember this one night when we first started seeing each other. She was still doing drugs then. Well, we were in the woods when she started saying this scary poem, over and over, about fire. And then she said, "Would you like to play with fire, little boy?", "Would you like to play with Bob?", "Would you like to play with Bob?"...

Sheriff: [Lucy is watching a soap opera] Morning, Lucy. What's going on?
Lucy: Uhh, thanks to Jade, Jared decided not to kill himself and he's changed his will, leaving the Towers to Jade instead of Emerald but Emerald found out about it and now she's trying to seduce Chet to give her the new will so she can destroy it. Montana's planning to kill Jared at midnight so the Towers will belong to Emerald and Montana but I think she's going to double cross him and he doesn't know it yet. Poor Chet.
Sheriff: What's going on... here?
Lucy: Uh, Agent Cooper is in the conference room with Dr. Jacoby.

Sheriff Harry S. Truman: [after Cooper has revealed the killer] How did you know?
Dale: Laura told me. In her dream.
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: We're going to need more a lot stronger evidence than this.
Dale: How about a confession?

FBI: Who's the babe?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: That is one of the most beautiful women in the state, Mrs. Packard.
FBI: Packard Sawmill?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Yep.
FBI: Where's Mr. Packard?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Died in a boating accident last year. Andrew Packard practically built this town. Brought her over from Hong Kong six years ago. Left her everything, which didn't exactly please his sister. That's her right there. The original deep freeze.
FBI: Who's the glad-handing dandy?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: Benjamin Horne, local big wig, he owns half the town. He's not after her, he's after her land.
FBI: Who's the lady with the log?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: We call her the log lady.

Dale: Anything?
Sheriff Harry S. Truman: No, nothing. She wants to speak to the South African Consulate.
Dale: [surprised] In Twin Peaks?

Harry: [to Cooper] You know, you are the best lawman I've ever seen. But, Coop, sometimes you think too much.