50 Best Sherlock, Season 4, Episode 2 Quotes

Mary: How the f...
Sherlock: Please, Mary, there is a child present.

[Last lines]
Sherlock: [narrating] When does the path we walk on lock around our feet? When does the road become a river with only one destination? Death waits for us all in Samarra. But can Samarra be avoided?

- Mrs Hudson: Everybody out now.
- All of you!
- This is my house, this is my friend, and that's his departed wife.
- Anyone who stays here a minute longer is admitting to me personally, they do not have a single spark of human decency.

DI: So, how's it going then, fatherhood?
Dr. John Watson: Oh, good, great. Yeah, amazing.
DI: Get any sleep?
Dr. John Watson: Christ, no.
DI: You at the beck and call of a screaming, demanding baby, woken up all hours to obey his every whim?
DI: [looking pointedly at Sherlock] Must feel very different.
Sherlock: Sorry. What?
Dr. John Watson: Yes, well, you know how it is. All you do is clean up their mess, pat them on the head...
Sherlock: You two having a little joke?
Dr. John Watson: Never a word of thanks. Can't even tell people's faces apart.
Dr. John Watson: This is a joke, isn't it?

Sherlock: I always know when the game is on. You know why?
Lady: Why?
Sherlock: Because I love it.

Mycroft: But remember this, brother mine. Agents like Mary tend not to reach retirement age. They *get* retired, in a pretty permanent sort of way.
Sherlock: Not on my watch.

Emma: Is your friend quite mad?
Dr. John Watson: No, he's an arsehole, but it's an easy mistake.

Sherlock: Can't stand it. Never can. There's a loose thread in the world.
Dr. John Watson: It doesn't mean you have to pull on it.
Sherlock: What kind of a life would that be?

Dr. John Watson: [angrily to Sherlock] Don't you dare. You made a vow. You swore it.

Sherlock: Intuitions are not to be ignored, John. They represent data processed too fast for the conscious mind to comprehend.

- Well, now.
- Won't you introduce me?

Sherlock: [referring to a taxi] That's mine. You two take a bus.
Dr. John Watson: I don't... Why?
Sherlock: I need to concentrate and I don't want to hit you.

- Back to normal.
Sherlock: Get out!
- Man: She's possessed by the devil.
- I swear my wife is channelling Satan!
- Yes, boring, go away.
- I'm not channelling Satan.
- Why not?
- Given your immediate alternative.

- That's not what dead people look like.
- Dead people look like things.
- I like to make people into things.
- Then you can own them.
- You know what,
- I'm getting a little impatient.

- Get out of my house.
- You reptile.

[first lines]
Mycroft: What you're about to see is classified beyond top secret. Is that quite clear? Don't minute any of this. Once beyond these walls, you must never speak of it. A D-notice has been slapped on the entire incident. Only those within this room, code-names Antarctica, Langdale, Porlock and Love, will ever know the whole truth. As far as everyone else is concerned, going to the Prime Minister and way beyond, Charles Augustus...
[to Sherlock]
Mycroft: Are you tweeting?

- Heard you the first time.
- How does that open?
- Screw the top.
- Two weeks ago?
- Th ree.
- I'm that predictable?
- I'm just a cock.

- Well? On you go.
- Examine him.

- We spent a night together.
- It was lovely.
- We had chips.
[In faith's voice] You're not what I expected, mr Holmes.
- You're...
- Nicer.

- Do you blame him?
- I don't blame him...
- I don't think about him.
- Has he attempted to make contact with you?
- How can you be sure?
- He might have tried.
- No, if Sherlock Holmes wants to get in touch, that's not something you can fail to notice.

- But those are only the ones we catch.
- Who do we catch?
- Serial killers.
- But if you are rich, and powerful, and necessary...
- Cu lverton: Anyone.
- What if you had the compulsion to kill and money? What then?
- -[Sirens wailing]

- Who you talking to?
- -piss off! [Slams door]
- So, what do you think?
- Of what?
- My case.
- Oh, it's way too weird for me.
- Go to the police. They're really excellent at dealing with this...
- Complicated sort of stuff.
- Tell them I sent you.
- That ought to get a reaction.
- Night-night.

Dr. John Watson: And, uh... you, too, Sherlock.
Sherlock: You, too, what?
Dr. John Watson: Godfather. We'd like you to be godfather.
Sherlock: God is a ludicrous fiction dreamt up by inadequates who abnegate all responsibility to an invisible magic friend.
Dr. John Watson: Yeah, but there'll be cake. Will you do it?
Sherlock: I'll get back to you.

- Culverton gave me faith's original note.
- A mutual friend put us in touch.
- Did Sherlock ever tell you about the note?
- I added some deductions for
- Sherlock. He was quite good.
- But he didn't get the big one.

- Not me. Not now.
- Now, you just listen to me for once in your stupid life.
- I know Mary's dead and I know your heart is broken.
- But if Sherlock Holmes dies too, who'll you have then?
- Because I'll tell you something, John Watson.
- You will not have me.

Mycroft: Is that sentiment talking?
Sherlock: No. It's me.
Mycroft: Difficult to tell the difference these days.

- I mean obviously, normal and fine are both relative terms when it comes to
- Sherlock and mycroft.
[Ch uckles] Obviously.

Mrs. Hudson: A case? Oh, you're not up to it, are you?
Sherlock: Work is the best antidote to sorrow, Mrs Hudson.

Dr. John Watson: You can't arrest a jellyfish.
Sherlock: You could try.

Sherlock: God is a ludicrous fiction, dreamt up by inadequates who abnegate all responsibility to an invisible magic friend.

[Laughs] Oh, dear. Oh, no.
- Who you talking to?
- What friend?
- Anyone.
[Laughing] Oh, no!
Sherlock: Faith?
[Panting] Oh god. Come on.

Sherlock: I delete any text that begins, "Hi."

- A name you instantly recognise that tore your world apart.
- Okay, well, how?
- No idea yet.
- But I don't work for free.
- You take cash?
- Not cash, no.

- Why would I need that?
- I don't know.
- Maybe you'd like a drink sometime.
- Of what?
- Up to you.
- Call me.

Mycroft: Looks very... fully functioning.
Sherlock: Is that really the best you can do?
Mycroft: Sorry, I've never been very good with them.
Sherlock: Babies?
Mycroft: Humans.

Sherlock: You ever think I'm becoming a bit... full of myself, cocky or overconfident...
Mrs. Hudson: Yes?
Sherlock: ...would you just say the word "Norbury" to me? Would you?
Mrs. Hudson: Norbury?
Sherlock: Just that. I'd be very grateful.

- Oh, I sent and deleted a text.
- You might get a reply but I doubt it.
- It's password protected.
- Please.
[Chuckles] We're going to have endless fun, mr Holmes. Aren't we?
- No, not endless.
- Need another hit, do you?
- It can wait until the hospital.

- Mycrofi': There's a car downstairs.
- You know he should definitely have worn the hat.
- Still thinking about Sherlock?
- No, you are.
- You've got your disapproving face on.
- Well, seeing as I'm inside your head,
- I think we can call that self-loathing.

Mary: Go to hell, Sherlock.

- N ews read er: Culverton Smith, earlier today.
- In Nottingham...
- He's right, you know, you probably saved his life.
- What are you doing? Wake up!
- I really hit him, Greg.
- Hit him hard.
- John: Is this a game?
- A bloody game.

- This is your father's favourite room.
- Come and meet his best friends.
- Faith: Dad? What's happening?
- What was that text?
- Another one of yourjokes? [Chuckles]
- Who are you?

- Leave him be.
- It's okay.
- Let him do what he wants.
- He's entitled.
- I killed his wife.
- Yes, you did.

- You know I'm a killer.
- But did you know...
- I'm a...
- Cut that. What was that?
- Was that a light?
- Uh, was that me?
- Was I too good? Huh?
- He's here.

- There, see, it's obvious.
- You can't tell things like that from a piece of paper.
- Think I just did, didn't I?
- I'm sure that was me. [Sniffs]
- How?
- Dunno.
- Sort of happens.
- Like a reflex, I can't stop it.

- Oh, erm...
- What. What is it?
- What's wrong?
[Ch uckles] Seriously?
- I'm Sherlock Holmes.
- I wear the damn hat.
- Isn't that right, Mary?

- You're not what I expected, you're...
- What? What am I?
- Nicer.
- Than who?
- Anyone.
- Child's voice: [Singing]
- My little master, who will find me...
- Sorry, I...
- Faith? Faith!

Sherlock: [to Mycroft] What are you, Wikipedia?

- Or just take a look at him as a doctor.
- I know you'd change your mind if you did.
- Yeah, look. Okay.
- Maybe, if I get a chance.
- Do you promise?
- I'll try if I'm in the area.
- Promise me?
- I promise.
- Thank you.

Sherlock: Mary, no human action is ever truly random. An advanced grasp of the mathematics of probability mapped onto a thorough apprehension of human psychology and the known dispositions of any given individual can reduce the number of variables considerably. I myself know of at least 58 techniques to refine a seemingly infinite array of randomly generated possibilities down to the smallest number of feasible variables.
Sherlock: But they're really difficult, so instead I just stuck a tracer on the inside of the memory stick.
[starts chuckling]

- is a living, breathing coagulation of human evil.
- If the only thing I ever do in this world is drive him out of it, then my life will not have been wasted.
- Look at me.
- Can't do it. Not now.
- Not alone.