The Best David Morse Quotes

Dr. Gregory House: [to Tritter] I'm a cripple who works in a hospital. You don't think I can get a valid prescription?
Michael: Arrogant son-of-a-bitch like you? Oh, I bet you didn't bother.

Michael: [stops Cameron by showing her his badge] Mind if we talk a few minutes?
[cut to semi-dark private room]
Michael: How many pills would you say Dr. House takes a day?
Dr. Allison Cameron: I'm uncomfortable setting a number.
Michael: Hmm. Try.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Six.
Michael: A day.
[Cameron nods]
Michael: Has he ever had you... write prescriptions for him?
Dr. Allison Cameron: No. What is it you want me to say? That he takes too many pills and is a danger to the hospital or he takes too few because he's selling them on the side? Either one is ridiculous.
Michael: I meant the former.
Dr. Allison Cameron: You're wrong.
Michael: Can I ask what Dr. House has done to deserve your loyalty? He's not known as a great boss. He's not even much of a friend. I mean, look how he left Dr. Wilson holding the bag.
[Cameron's expression changes]
Michael: It's odd. You don't know about that. You defend him, and he won't even tell you what's happening in his life.
[pager beeps; Cameron leaves Tritter off-camera]

Michael: [to House] I was waiting two hours out there.
Dr. Gregory House: Fascinating. Have you considered a career as a memoirist?

[first lines]
Michael: Merry Christmas.
Dr. Gregory House: And a Happy Go-to-Hell.

Dr. James Wilson: [to House] You punched out an employee, you nearly cut a little girl in half because you were too strung out...
Dr. Gregory House: I was in pain! You need to believe that I've got a problem so that your betrayal has the illusion of nobility, but you just selfishly...
Michael: Knock it off. Look, I don't care why Dr. Wilson is doing this and right now, it makes no difference to you either. You need to deal with the reality of your current situation. You want to stand on principle, you end up in a cell and you end up never practicing medicine again. So you got two choices: your principles or your life.
Dr. Gregory House: Get out of my office.
Michael: [shakes his head] The DA put a clock on the deal. You got three days to decide.

Dr. Allison Cameron: Gonna break out the rubber hoses, the bright lights? I'm not gonna testify just because I have to borrow lunch money.
Michael: I know. Women don't give up on guys that they're in love with.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I'm not in love with House.
Michael: A guy as unhinged and unethical does what he wants with no concern for others, but you stand by him.
Dr. Allison Cameron: That can't just be loyality and respect?
Michael: No.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I'm a girl, so I must be in love with him.
Michael: Not because you're a girl. Because 10 years ago, you got an "A" in calculus until you ratted yourself out, showed your professor a mistake he missed, because you married a man...
Dr. Allison Cameron: [angry tone] Don't go there!
Michael: You used to be someone who did the right thing. House has changed you. Do you think it's all been for the better?
[Cameron walks out of the room]

Adam: Shut the fuck up!

Michael: [to House] Cuddy wouldn't get off the phone until I promised I'd come and see for myself. I gotta admit. This move I did not expect.
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah, well, don't tell anyone, but the photos of smiling people in the brochures. It's just marketing.
Michael: Well, you're obviously making an effort. So I suppose the next step is for me to... talk to the DA.
Dr. Gregory House: Which you have no intention of doing.
Michael: No.
Dr. Gregory House: So words mean nothing, actions mean nothing, what the hell is left?
Michael: [shrugs] Hmph.
Dr. Gregory House: You son of a bitch! What about your words, your actions? "Gotta get House cleaned up, gotta get him to show some humility," but when it comes to actually doing something, you proved that all you care about is bitch-slapping a guy who refused to kiss your ass.
Michael: You ever trust an addict? You ever give one the benefit of the doubt? How many times did it work out for yo...
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it. So you were screwed over by your wife, your mother, your partner, but you keep sending them Christmas cards while you take it out on everyone else.
Michael: No more Christmas cards. No, I learned people like you, even your actions lie.

Gerry: You're with CIA?
Ex: But they're not with me.

Michael: I don't wanna sue you.
Dr. Gregory House: Good.
Michael: I want to beat the crap out of you.
Dr. Gregory House: Less good.

Michael: The last nurse you made fun of? She probably slipped some crap into your coffee.
Dr. Gregory House: Mmmm yeah. I asked for de-crappinated coffee.

Gerry: Why did you sell guns to the North?
Ex: Why not?

Michael: [to House] Just take a swab and get it tested, OK?
Dr. Gregory House: Sorry. Already met this month's quota of useless tests for stubborn idiots.

Michael: [to House] I spoke with the DA. He agreed to two months in a rehab facility in exchange for a guilty plea.
Dr. Gregory House: Get out of my office.
Dr. James Wilson: No jail time.
Dr. Gregory House: Right, so I should get locked up in some place I don't belong in order to avoid getting locked up in some other place I don't belong.

Dr. Lisa Cuddy: [to Tritter] My head of Oncology had to shut down. My entire staff are afraid to make a move without covering their ass.
Michael: I think you're angry at the wrong person.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: You think Dr. Wilson deserved to have his assets seized? His entire practice ruined?
Michael: No.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: So, you just don't care?
Michael: This is how I get what I want. I put pressure... on people, and if it doesn't work on Wilson, it'll work on you.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: You punish the innocent.
Michael: None of you are innocent. Not one of you, not one of you has told me the truth about Dr. House.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: The pills allow him to cope with the pain.
Michael: No, the pills distort reality. He's an addict.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: He's not out robbing a liquor store or...
Michael: Look, he's treating people. He needs to find a different way to cope before he kills somebody, if he hasn't done that already.
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: If you're right, he has a medical problem. It should be dealt with by doctors, not by the...!
Michael: Well, it's not being dealt with by doctors. Doctors are covering it up. The whole point of the criminal justice system is to make things right when everything else fails. With all due respect, you have failed.

Dr. James Wilson: [to Tritter] I can't testify. Drug addicts hurt the people around them with their habit.
Michael: House has hurt plenty of people. You included.
Dr. James Wilson: He saves lives, people that no one else can save and no matter how much of an ass he is. Statistically, House is a positive force in the universe. Pills let him do that.
Michael: Vicodin does not make House a genius. Whatever he does on the pills, he can do off. He is just not willing to try.
Dr. James Wilson: I won't testify against him.
Michael: Then we'll subpoena you, your previous statement will be read into evidence and you'll be charged with interfering with an investigation, and you will go to jail.
Dr. James Wilson: Again, statistically better me than him.
Michael: Statistically, the two of you will be in jail.

Webster: Milton, if memory serves, you were always partial to the Chevelle, yes?

Dr. Gregory House: [to Tritter] I'm sorry. You could throw a dart at all the adjectives between arrogant and unhinged and I'm sure you'd hit one that describes me. There's a reason I operate that way... I live in pain. Pain that on good days is merely intolerable and on bad ones will suck the life-force right out of you. Doesn't mean that I've handled this right, actually, means I was wrong.
Michael: Thank you. I know that couldn't have been easy for you to say. Even if you don't mean a word of it.
[Tritter starts to walk away, but House follows him]
Dr. Gregory House: I'm sorry! You can hook me up to a damn polygraph.
Michael: And I'm sure you'd pass. The thing is I've never been interested in what you have to say. All I care about is what you do. I'll see you at the hearing.