The Best Dick Jones Quotes

Dick: Come in, officer. You know, I usually don't see anyone without an appointment, but your case I'll make an exception.
RoboCop: You are under arrest.
Dick: Oh? On what charge?
RoboCop: Aiding and abetting a known felon.
Dick: Sounds like I'm in a lot of trouble. You better take me in.
RoboCop: I will.
[Then RoboCop's Directive prevents him from arresting Jones, and is trying to fight it]
Dick: What's the matter officer? I'll tell you what's the matter. It's a little insurance policy called "Directive 4", my little contribution to your psychological profile. Any attempt to arrest a senior officer of OCP results in shutdown. What did you think? That you were an ordinary police officer? You're our product, and we can't very well have our products turning against us, can we?
[RoboCop, trying to resist his Directive, draws his gun, but drops it]
Dick: Ahh, still a little fight left in you. Maybe you'd like to meet a friend of mine.
[ED-209 marches into the room]
Dick: I had to kill Bob Morton because he made a mistake. Now it's time to erase that mistake.

[for demonstration, Mr. Kinney points a pistol at ED-209]
ED: [menacingly] Please put down your weapon. You have twenty seconds to comply.
Dick: I think you'd better do what he says, Mr. Kinney.
[Mr. Kinney drops the pistol on the floor. ED-209 advances, growling]
ED: You now have fifteen seconds to comply.
[Mr. Kinney turns to Dick Jones, who looks nervous]
ED: You are in direct violation of Penal Code 1.13, Section 9.
[entire room of people in full panic trying to stay out of the line of fire, especially Mr. Kinney]
ED: You have five seconds to comply.
Kinney: Help...! Help me!
ED: Four... three... two... one... I am now authorized to use physical force!
[ED-209 opens fire and shreds Mr. Kinney]

The: How can we help you, officer?
RoboCop: Dick Jones is wanted for murder.
Dick: [Directive 4 starts flashing on RoboCop's status monitor] This is absurd! That thing... is a violent mechanical psychopath!
RoboCop: My program will not allow me to act against an officer of this company.
The: These are serious charges. What is your evidence?
[RoboCop turns to the wall and inserts his data spike into the wall socket, a video starts to play]
Dick: [from video playback] I had to kill Bob Morton because he made a mistake. Now it's time to erase that mistake. I had to kill Bob Morton because he made a mistake. Now it's time to erase that mistake.
Dick: [takes a gun and holds it against the Old Man's head, wrapping his arm around his neck] Get up! Get up! I want a chopper, now! We will walk to the roof very calmly, I will board the chopper with my hostage. Anybody tries to stop me... the old geezer gets it.
The: Dick, you're fired!
[Directive 4 disappears from RoboCop's status monitor]
RoboCop: Thank you.
[the Old Man jabs Dick Jones from behind with his elbow, and RoboCop starts shooting at Dick Jones, who is no longer an OCP employee; Dick Jones falls through a glass window to the ground below and dies]

Bob: What the fuck are you doing? Do you know who I am? If you think you're gonna get away with this, you got another thing... Ahh!
[Clarence Boddicker shoots Morton in the leg. Morton falls]
Bob: Goddammit!
[Clarence fires three more times, shooting Morton in both legs]
Bob: [whimpers] Stop! I'll give you anything you want! Just please, please don't kill me, all right?
[Clarence pops in a CD and the sneering face of Dick Jones appears onscreen]
Dick: Hello, buddy boy. Dick Jones here. I guess you're on your knees right about now, begging for your life. Pathetic. You don't feel so cocky now, do ya, Bob?
Bob: Whatever he's paying you, I'll double it right now.
Dick: You know what the tragedy is here, Bob? We could have been friends...
[Clarence pulls out a grenade with a pin in it]
Dick: ...but you wouldn't go through proper channels.
[Bob shakes his head "no."]
Dick: You went over my head. That hurt...
[Clarence pulls out the pin with his tongue, setting the timer]
Dick: ...but life goes on, it's an old story, the fight for love and glory, huh, Bob? It helps if you think of it as a game, Bob. Every game has a winner and a loser.
[Clarence confidently walks out. Morton desperately crawls toward the grenade, bleeding profusely from his legs]
Dick: I'm cashing you out, Bob.
[last thing we see is Morton failing to get a firm grip on the rolling grenade and Jones' smiling face just before the house explodes]

Clarence: Hey, Dickey boy. How's tricks?
Dick: That *thing* is still alive.
Clarence: I don't know what you're talking about.
Dick: The police officer who arrested you, the one you spilled your guts to.
Clarence: [gets up close to Jones' face] Hey... take a look at my face, *Dick*! He was trying to kill me.
Dick: He's a cyborg, you idiot! He recorded every word you said. His memory's admissible as evidence! You *involved* me! You're gonna have to kill it.
Clarence: Well, listen, chief... your company built the fucking thing! Now I gotta deal with it? I don't have time for this bullshit!
[Clarence starts heading out the doors but Dick recaptures his interest]
Dick: Suit yourself, Clarence... but Delta City begins construction in two months. That's two million workers living in trailers. That means drugs, gambling, prostitution - virgin territory for the man who knows how to open up new markets. One man could control it all, Clarence.
Clarence: Well, I guess we're gonna be friends after all... *Richard*.
Dick: [tosses RoboCop's tracking device to Clarence] Destroy it.
Clarence: Gonna need some major firepower. You got access to military weaponry?
Dick: We practically are the military.

[ED-209 has malfunctioned during a demonstration, killing Kinney in the boardroom]
The: [12:43] Dick, I'm very disappointed.
Dick: I'm sure it's only a glitch, a temporary setback.
The: [raises his voice in anger] You call this a GLITCH?
[pause]
The: We're scheduled to begin construction in six months. Your "temporary setback" could cost us fifty million dollars in interest payments alone!

Dick: [in the executive bathroom] Congratulations, Bob.
Bob: Thanks.
Dick: I remember when I was a young executive for this company. I used to call the old man funny names - Iron Butt, Boner... once I even called him... Asshole - but there was always respect. I always knew where the line was drawn, and you just stepped over it, buddy-boy. You've insulted me and you've insulted this company with that bastard creation of yours. I had a guaranteed military sale with ED 209 - renovation program, spare parts for twenty-five years... Who cares if it worked or not?
Bob: The old man thought it was pretty important... Dick.
Dick: You know, he's a sweet old man, and he means well, but he's not gonna live forever and I'm number two around here. Pretty simple math, huh, Bob? You just, uh...
Dick: [grabbing Morton's hair] ... fucked with the wrong guy.
Bob: [removes Jones' hand from his hair] You're out of your fuckin' mind!
Dick: You'd better pray that that unholy monster of yours doesn't screw up.