The Best Handsome Rob Quotes

Lyle: [about Stella getting into Steve's house and finding the location of the safe by impersonating a Netcom employee] You think Stella can pull it off?
Handsome: I have my doubts... but there's no talking to Charlie
Lyle: [in an accent] What, you theenk he's meexing beesness with plezore?
Handsome: He should know better. Only "I'm" allowed to do that.

Lyle: [seeing the name "Becky" on the cable-girl's uniform; specifically on her left breast] Becky, huh? Nice name. I wonder what she calls the other one...
Handsome: [sarcastically, jokingly] And it's such a mystery why you don't have a girlfriend, Lyle.

Charlie: Napster, Gridlock every route except the one we chose. Force that truck to go exactly where we want it to go.
Handsome: Where do we want it to go? We can't have a shoot up without guns. We'd lose.
Charlie: We do it like The Italian Job.

Lyle: [looking at his name on their new ID's] James Hymen? Come one, just once give me a cool name!
Left: A hundred and forty pounds? Try one sixty five!
Handsome: Try lifting some weights!
[as everyone is leaving Lyle still notices his bike is still laying on the ground]
Lyle: Hey, Charlie?
Charlie: Handsome? Think you can help him with his bike?
Left: Yeah, help Knievel set up for his next jump!

[Lyle isn't answering Charlie's calls]
Handsome: He only answers to "The Napster" now, Charlie
Charlie: Oh, no. I am not calling you The Napster.
Lyle: Why not? You call him Left Ear.
Left: Well, I am.
Lyle: And him Handsome Rob.
Charlie: Well, that's because he is Handsome Rob!
Lyle: Well you can call me The Napster.

Left: [reading from a guide book] "Learn the language of poetry, art, romance, sex..."
Handsome: Unlike you, my friend, I don't need a guide book. Can we go?

Handsome: [after learning the value of the gold they've stolen] Twenty-seven million...
Left: Say it again, man.
Handsome: [louder] Twenty-seven million!
Left: Again!
Handsome: *Twenty-seven million!*

Lyle: [referring to Sean Parker] And then he's just the media darling... He's on the cover of all the magazines, I should of been on the cover of Wired Magazine. You know what he said? He said he named it "Napster" because it was his nickname because of the nappy hair under the hat. But he, it's because I was NAPPING when he STOLE it from me! He didn't even graduate!
Handsome: I think it's time to move on, don't you? They shut him down, I wish they would do the same to you.

Lyle: [tell the other what he's planning to do with his share of the gold] I'm getting a NAD T770 digital decoder with 70-watt amps and Burr-Brown DACs.
Left: [confused] Yeah...
Lyle: It's a big stereo. Speakers so loud, they blow women's clothes off!
Handsome: Now you're talking!

[Lyle wants to be called "The Napster"]
Handsome: Come on, Charlie. They were at the same college at the same time.
Charlie: Why are you encouraging this?

[timing the getaway to Union Station]
Handsome: It's either bad traffic, peak traffic, slit-your-wrist traffic... you know, five people died from smoking in between traffic lights today.
Left: You know, they do have the Metrorail, Rob, you could always use that.
Handsome: Yeah, that'd be ideal for carrying a ton of gold now, wouldn't it, genius?
Charlie: What's your guesstimate?
Handsome: The last twenty times I done this journey, you've got an average of thirty two minutes and a top time of fifty, but if we had green lights all the way, we could do it in fourteen minutes.
Stella: [poking fun] What? Couldn't get through traffic?

Actor: Turn in your badge and your weapon. I don't want to see you anywhere near this investigation.
[Drinks from an imaginary cup and then pretends to crush the cup]
Actor: Crush. I don't wanna see you anywhere near this investigation!
[rehearses his lines quicker, while Handsome Rob waits at the lights impatiently]
Actor: Turn in your badge. And your weapon. I don't wanna see you anywhere this investigation.
[the lights turn green]
Handsome: Oi, it's a *green*!
Actor: [rehearsing lines again] Turn in your badge and your weapon.
Handsome: GREEN!
[Handsome Rob honks his horn repeatedly]
Actor: [driving off rehearsing his lines] Turn in your badge and your weapon, I don't wanna see you anywhere near this investigation!
[drives off and flips Handsome Rob off]
Handsome: Unbelievable!