The Best Nia Long Quotes

Assistant: Have you killed Eric? I suggest you cover it up. I'm not in the mood for that paperwork.
Sam: Nah, I left him at Westside Electric. He needed to upload some new software, and I needed to stop listening to his Mannheim Steamroller playlist.

Philip: Hi kids.
Lisa: Hi Mr. Banks. Would you like to join us for dinner?
Philip: As lovely as that stinks, uh smells, I'll pass.

[observing the fight with their partners]
Louise: That is so juvenile!
Lisa: I know, and I have never seen anything so STUPID!
Louise: You calling my husband stupid? Honey, the only thing stupid here is your big-eared boyfriend, he looks like a car coming down the road with both doors open!
Lisa: Okay, WEEZY, it's on now!
Louise: All right, sister, bring it on!
[start their own fight]

[Will, wearing a fat suit, is spying on Lisa]
Lisa: Will? Is that you?
Will: Well it ain't Fat Albert.

[Will just cancelled his "Shaft" wedding with Lisa]
Will: Look, Lisa, I want to marry you, but definitely not like this.
Lisa: Right on.
Will: Oh, by the way, dude, your Isaac Hayes impression stinks.
Isaac: Oh, I don't know. I thought it was pretty good.

Mrs. Jones: [Talking to Dana] You see what I said to tell us before you leave the house.
Debbie: [Talking to Felisha] Look at your face! Look at your face!
Felisha: It's going to be okay.
Debbie: No, look at your face.
Debbie: [Talking to Deebo] Who do you think you are?
Deebo: Girl what are you talking about?
Debbie: You know what I'm talking about, punk. You hit my sister like if she was a fucking man.
Deebo: She had no business going through my pants when I was asleep!
Debbie: My sister don't need to steal nothing from your broke ass all right.
Deebo: It's best for you to take your ass home.
Debbie: I'M NOT SCARED OF YOU! All these niggas around here might be scared of you, but I'm not.
Deebo: [Throws the bike and stands up] YOU TAKE YOUR ASS HOME!
Debbie: NO, FUCK YOU! You're lucky I'm not a man, otherwise I kick yo ass myself.
Deebo: [Slaps Debbie in the face] SHUT UP!

Assistant: [Talking to the agents after an epic TV cop shootout about something TV cops never do] That was a major shooting incident. I'm sure you have lots of paperwork to handle.