The Best Machete (segment "Planet Terror") Quotes

Announcer: [first lines, voiceover] They called him Machete.
Machete: [voiceover] Seventy dollars a day for yard work. Hundred for roofing.
The: [car with The Boss pulls up] Get in.
Machete: [cut to Machete in car with The Boss] One-twenty-five for septic... sewage.
The: Have you ever killed anyone before?

[from Machete trailer]
Priest: I took a vow of peace. And now you want me to help you KILL these men?
Machete: Yes, bro... I mean Padre.
Priest: I'll see what I can do.
[pumps shotguns]