20 Best The Boss Baby Quotes

Tim: You can't be fired from your own family. Can you?

Tim: Even though I never went to business school I did learn to share in kindergarten. And if there isn't enough love for the two of us then I wanna give you all of mine.

Dad: Meet your new baby
[in slow motion]
Dad: brother.

Tim: [to Boss Baby] What if you go baby again?
Boss: Don't worry. I'll be fine.
[Goes into normal baby mode]
Boss: Fine, fine, fine...
[Slaps]
Boss: ... fine!

Tim: You can talk!
Boss: Uh, goo goo ga ga.
Tim: No, you can really talk!
Boss: Fine! I can talk. Now let's see if you can listen. Give me a double espresso and find a place around here with decent sushi, I'd KILL for a spicy tuna roll right about now.
[gives Tim some money]
Boss: Get yourself a little somethin'.

Tim: Can't we just share?
Boss: You obviously didn't go to business school.

Boss: I can't do this without you, Tim. I need you.
Tim: I guess we DO make a pretty good team.
Boss: No literally... I can't reach the doorknobs.

[last lines]
Tim's: Daddy, is that a true story?
Adult: Well, sweetie That's how I remember it. But you what I learned? There's plenty of love for everyone.
Tim's: Even me?
Adult: Especially you. Just ask your uncle Ted.
Boss: Hey there. I hear you're going to have a baby siter.
Tim's: I wanted a horse.
Boss: Get yourself a horse.
[throws her money then turns to Tim]
Boss: I'm proud of you, Lesley.
Adult: Right back at you, Linsey.
Tim's: Hey there.
[stares at her new baby sister who wears a suit and looks like Boss Baby. She gasps and the baby winks]

Tim: [from trailer]
[about the baby]
Tim: Look at him! He wears a suit...
Mother: He's like a little man!
Tim: He carries a briefcase! Does no one else think that's, oh, I don't know, a little freaky?

Boss: Upsies! I need upsies!

[after the end credits; the alarm clock goes off]
Wizzie: Wake up, little halflings. It's time to leave. Go and live your peasant lives.
[the background music goes higher]
Wizzie: [flailing his arms up and down] Be gone with you!
[fade to black]

[repeated line]
Boss: Fart! Poop! Doody!

[from trailer]
[at a conference with other babies]
Boss: Put... that... cookie... down! Cookies are for closers!

Tim: [regarding Baby Corp] So this whole place is run by babies?
Boss: Yep.
Tim: My dad says "Those who can, do. And those who can't, supervise."
Boss: Your father is a hippie.

Tim: Who ARE you?
Boss: I'm the *boss*.

Dad: Look, they have a puppy pool and everything!
Mother: [sarcastically] Isn't that sanitary?

[Tim and Boss Baby are riding a bicycle with training wheels, going after their parents, who are on their way to the airport, while being chased by Eugene]
Boss: Tim, you gotta go faster!
Tim: I can't! I can't do it!
Boss: Yes. you can!
[Leaps up onto Tim's shoulder]
Boss: You've got it in you, Templeton. Now, eyes ahead. I said, eyes ahead, son! Buttocks up! Now, pedal like you mean it! Either you run the day, or the day runs you.
Boss: [Tim pedals faster. Eugene almost catches them, but Boss Baby dodges his grasp, and they get further away] Good!
[the bicycle's training wheels break off]
Boss: Uh-oh!
Tim: Woah! My training wheels! I can't ride without my training wheels!
Boss: Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right!
Tim: Aah! What are you talking about?
Boss: The path to success is not a straight line, Templeton! But rather a wild ride, like a ship at sea. And you're a sea captain... taming a turbulent ocean!
[the scene transforms from a suburb to an ocean, with Tim and Boss Baby riding a boat]
Tim: I'm a sea captain, taming the ocean!
Boss: [They evade the incoming 'whale'] Good!
Tim: Tree! I'm gonna hit it!
Boss: Aim for failure, and you'll always succeed.
Tim: What?
Boss: AIM AWAY FROM FAILURE!
[Tim steers away from the tree, the scene transforms back into a suburb backdrop]
Tim: I'm doing it, I'm doing it!
[They travel through a forest, with Eugene close behind who is smashing past trees]
Boss: Once success is a habit, then it's all down...
Tim,1371: HILL!
[They ride down a hill. At which time, they see the car which their parents are in with Francis Francis]
Tim: Look! There they are! Mom! Dad!
[as the car passes the train crossing, a train passes by]
Tim: Train!
Boss: Choo-choo!
Boss: [They continue to approach the train crossing, with Eugene close behind] Templeton, stop!
[Tim notices a mold of sand at a construction site next to the tracks, he steers towards it]
Boss: What are you doing?
[Tim pedals faster, the scene transforms into a ramp, with them riding a motorcycle, at the end of the ramp there is a ring of fire]
Tim: We're going to make it.
Boss: But I don't have a quote for this!
[They jump, Boss Baby yells out 'Aaahhh'! And they make it, as the scene transform back into the 'real' world. Eugene crashes into the mold of sand, ending the pursuit]
Boss: [to Tim] You did it!
Tim: No! We did it!
Boss: And all without your training wheels.

Tim: [about "Blackbird"] That's my special song! My parents wrote it just for me.
Boss: Your parents are Lennon and McCartney?
Tim: No, Ted and Janice! You don't even know their names!

Tim: What was Big Bossy Baby Lady screaming about?
Boss: She's demanding actual results!

Boss: [in puppy costume] I've never been so humiliated in all my LIFE.
[dog sniffs costume's bottom part]
Boss: Ugh!