The Best Sgt. Howard Hunter Quotes

Sgt. Howard Hunter: [during Roll Call] Sgt. Stanis Jablonski, Metro Police, retired, is going hunting with several of our colleagues.
Sgt. Lucy Bates: They're going out to kill Bambi.
[laughter and murmering from the other cops]
Sgt. Lucy Bates: They're going out to slaughter poor defenceless creatures.
Officer J.D. LaRue: Hey, if you can eat it, you can kill it.
Sgt. Lucy Bates: Wanna keep your personal life to yourself, LaRue?

Sgt. Howard Hunter: Item six, a memo from division: since the new copy machines have been installed, printing costs from all precincts have risen over 300 per cent. Starting noon today, the copier will accept only those documents that have been stamped with a police identification code.
[rumbling from the cops in attendance]
Sgt. Howard Hunter: Further more, the department will absorb the cost of four, and only four, reprints. Any number over four, and it's your nickle.
Officer J.D. LaRue: Hey sarge, sergeant, are you aware that the D.A.'s office is asking for five copies of all arrest reports?
Sgt. Howard Hunter: Which is why God invented carbon paper, detective.