The Best How I Met Your Mother, Season 2, Episode 15 Quotes

Ted: This penny is over sixty years old. Did you know this penny was minted during World War II?
Robin: So was my grandfather, but he's not that interesting either.

- Okay, so we agree?
- This goes back to Lily wanting to camp out for a wedding dress?
- No.
- Wait. It goes back further.
- Remember why we were eating hot dogs on the East Side?

Barney: Step one to running a marathon: You run. There is no step two.

- craziest bride in New York.
- Ooh, this is comfy.
- We might actually be able to sleep.
- That's kind of annoying.
- Well, I'm sure somebody will be out here to turn it off any minute.

Barney: My legs don't work. I have ridden the subway twice from end to end. I've been where it turns around. Ted, you don't ever want to see where it turns around.

Lily: We'll all have a wedding dress camp-out. It'll be fun.
Barney: I can't go. I've got this thing.
Lily: What thing?
Barney: A penis.

- Oh, come on.
- You're not even going to give up your seat for him?
- I'm sorry. I can't.
- Douche.

- Oh, oh, oh, oh!
- Oh, oh, oh, oh!
- BOTH: Ooh...!
- Ooh!
- Mah, mah, mah, mah...
[crying]: Oh, no.

- This is a cool job.
- Please, I have to be on this flight.
- I'll see what I can do.
- But it doesn't look good.
- Thanks.
- Your uniforms are pretty.

Robin: Barney we're talking about 42 kilometres.
Ted: Thanks Canada, I'll take it from here: Barney! It's like 26 miles!

- My pants are starting to feel a little tight.
- Oh, that's okay.
- I love that cute little belly.
- I cannot allow this.
- What?
- I am going to run the New York City Marathon.

Lily: [a marathon runner grabs Lily's water bottle as he runs past her] Hey, that's mine!
[shouts]
Lily: Yeah, you better run!

- Listen to me, I need you to come and pick me up on the subway.
- What, what are you talking about?
- I was sitting here, totally minding my own business.
- Finisher.
- Yeah, you know, what I mean.
Man Sitting Next to Barney on the Subway: [over P.A.] 86th street.

Lily: Marshall used to think he was indestructible.
Marshall: Well, it added up. I've never broken anything, I've never been sick, and when I need to, I can summon incredible strength. Ted, tell her the story about the really heavy door.
Ted: [to Robin] It was a really heavy door. He opened it.
Marshall: On *one* pull.

- Just like the book said.
- Yeah, but from now on,
- I'm eating all of my breakfast runner-style.
- Liquids are digested faster.
- That way, no energy is wasted, and it's all about the run.

- Kids, funny thing about destiny--
- I thought I was destined to get that job.
- But I was wrong.
- My destiny was to stay in New York.
- Because if I hadn't,
- I never would have met your mother.

- from Pelham Bay Park in the Bronx.
- Meet me at the 86th Street station in, like, half an hour?
- All right.
- I'll be right there.
- Stay where you are.
- Ted, Ted.