The Best The Sopranos, Season 3, Episode 6 Quotes

[Bobby Baccalieri and Vito Spatafore are standing next to each other in Bada Bing. Paulie sees them]
Paulie: Look at this! It's like an advert for weight watchers! Before... and way before!

- Really beautiful, Noah.
- It's not that bad, okay?
- I want options when
- I graduate, Meadow.
- I'm going to law school in two short years.
- A c-minus is fucked for me.
- It's early in the semester, you'll make it up.

- That make you feel good?
- You feel like a man?

Paulie: Cocksucker was way out of line!
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: 20 years old, this girl!
Paulie: That too.

Silvio: [after banging on Ralphie's door] Where's Tracee?
Ralphie: She's busy
Tracee: hey, Sil
Silvio: [to Tracee] Put your shoes on
Ralphie: Oh, what'd I say?
Silvio: I don't know. What'd you fuckin say? Three days she missed work
Tracee: I've been sick Sil
Silvio: Oh, yeah? I called your house: your mother says you haven't been there for two days either
Tracee: I was here, Ralph's taking care of me
Silvio: [after cursing at her in Italian] You got a little kid at home
Ralphie: Her mother's watching him
Silvio: Mind your fuckin business Ralph
Ralphie: [yells] Where do you get the balls to come here?
Silvio: [yells louder, referring to the debt Tracee owes Sil] Three grand this is costing me, and where do I get my fuckin balls?

- Listen to me, you little boochiac'.
- Until you pay what you owe, that shaved twat of yours belongs to me!
- You understand?!
- I asked you a question.
- Yeah, now, get in the car.

- Give me a fucking drink.
- What happened to you?
- Tracee.
- She slipped.
- We were arguing, I don't know.
- She fell.

Carmela: [pleasantly surprised to see her, while in the kitchen] What're you doing home? Don't you have class?
Meadow: It's Friday: only in the mornings
Carmela: You got a postcard from the dentist, it's time to schedule a cleaning
Meadow: God, I just went. It smells great, what is that?
Carmela: It's a Bundt cake for AJ's fundraiser
Meadow: Nice shoes, daddy home?
Carmela: His upstairs
Carmela: What's with you? You seem...
Meadow: [interrupts her] What?
Carmela: Nothing, I don't know
Meadow: Hey, you know what I read? their making a movie with Eloise
Carmela: Really? That should be cute
Meadow: It's supposed to come out around Christmas or something: you remember at The Plaza that time, the kid kept calling her "Heloise?" And I almost got into a fight with her?
Carmela: Yes, that little Spanish girl
Meadow: She was so annoying
Carmela: I can't believe you even remember that, you were like nine or something?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [while entering the kitchen, kisses her on the cheek] Hey
Meadow: [uninterested] Hello
Meadow: [to her mother] So anyway, when it opens, we are so there: you and me
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [sarcastically to Meadow] I know your excited to see me but try to control yourself
Carmela: So, how's school? What's new?
Meadow: Caitlin's still a pain, she cries like over everything
Carmela: Probably misses her home: the poor thing
Meadow: [referring to her boyfriend Noah Tannenbaum] Thank God for Noah though, he's the only one who can calm her down. She started pulling her hair out last night when she saw a scary movie. She does it all the time now, her scalp is like all raw
Carmela: Oh my God
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [jokingly] Nothing like a straitjacket wouldn't cure
Meadow: [sarcastically] Sorry, I forgot it's Mr. Sensitivity who doesn't have any problems of his own
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: I'm agreeing with you
Meadow: [before leaving] Like you have a clue
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [irritated] Jesus Christ, what the fuck already?
Carmela: [referring to the conflict between Tony and Meadow] Cut her some slack, she's under a lot of strain and you did start this
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [referring to Noah] Did you see? How I didn't rise to the bait? The mulligan? A lot of good it did me, does anybody!
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [when Carmela ignores him] It's still going on

- How was the dentist?
- God, is there nothing to eat in this house?!

- My friend, Josh, from crossroads high school, I didn't tell you?
- No.
- Sorry, I thought I did.
- Anyway, he's coming in and we're gonna head up and see his brother at Hampshire.
- Try and get some rest, okay?

Silvio: [after she walks up to him] what's the matter Hun?
Tracee: nothing
Tracee: [getting his attention] Tony?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: how you doing sweetie?
Tracee: good, I took Danny to the doctor: like you said
Tracee: [when she notices he doesn't recall] my son?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: oh yeah, yeah, right, right. How's he doing?
Tracee: you were right, just a chest pull, not pneumonia, thank God
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: good to hear it
Tracee: [hands him the plate] I made you some bread, you know, as a "thank you"?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: you didn't have to do that
Tracee: no, really, I wanted to: it's Date Nut for breakfast
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: listen... Tracee, right?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [after she nods] the bread's very sweet: you're a great girl. Don't take this the wrong way but you can't be doing stuff like this
Silvio: [to Tracee] no good
Tracee: but I just wanted to say "thanks"
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: I know but I already got a family, you know, they give me gifts. What we have is an employee, employer, "thing"
Tracee: can't we be friends?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [referring to their romantically involved] yeah, well, I'm not so sure that's a good idea either because you and Ralphie...
Tracee: Yeah, Ralphie
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: I'm glad your kid's ok
Silvio: [points to his watch, referring to the fictional character and brand name, telling her to go back to work] let's go betty Crocker

Ralphie: Oh what, not even a hello?
Tracee: Fuck you, asshole.
Ralphie: Oh that's very nice. That's how you talk to a man in front of his friends?
Tracee: Yeah, right. What man?
Christopher: Oh, a double!
Bobby: You tell him, sweety!
Gigi: [clapping] I like this girl!
Ralphie: Women, women, women . Why wasn't I born handsome instead of rich?

Ralphie: What are you being like this for?
Tracee: Fuck you. Three days you don't call, not even to see how I am.
Ralphie: Baby, I'm busy. I gotta work! How else am I gonna take care of you when you're nine months pregnant?
Tracee: Serious?
Ralphie: Of course I'm serious!
Tracee: Ralphie, I love you.
Ralphie: I love you too, baby. Hey, if it's a boy, we'll name him after me. If it's a girl, we'll name it Tracee after you... that way she could grow up to be a cocksuckin' slob just like her mother. Are you out of your fucking mind?
Tracee: Guinea motherfuckin' piece of shit!
Ralphie: Yeah, that's right. Get it out! Get it out you little whore!

Georgie: [repeated line to strippers at the Bada Bing telling them what he wants if he wants to let them into the VIP lounge] it's fifty bucks to me and a blowjob later on.

- So, you wanna go or not?
- I put your whites in at 10:30.
- I need to wait until the dryer's free.
- Let Lilliana do it.
- Lilliana's off.
- It's gonna be a zoo by the time we get there.

- Meadow, are you in love with this boy?
- I don't know.
- I guess so.
- At this point, I better be.
- At what point, what does that mean?
- Sorry, but we are so not having that conversation.

- Did you see?
- How I didn't rise to the bait?
- The mulignan?
- A lot of good it did me.
- Does anybody!
- It's still going on!

- And get her the fuck out of here.
- You got a rug, a piece of carpet?
- Cocksucker was way out of line.
- 20 years old, this girl.
- That too.
- Let's go.

Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [to Carmela and Tony during Tony's therapy session] so things are better then? Since our first session?
Carmela: Yes I guess, we seem to talk more easily
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Sometimes painful sessions can break the "log jam"
Carmela: [Referring to Tony remaining silent] yes, then there's this
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [to Tony] you're being particularly quiet today,
Tony: Sometimes I got nothing to say
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Anthony, Carmela is here, she's giving up her time to talk about your panic attacks
Tony: A young man who worked for us at Barone sanitation died
Carmela: Who?
Tony: You don't know him. He died that's all, a "work related" death. It's sad when they go so young

Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: At your age, with your situation, you need another kid like you need a fucking hole in the head. You're young, you still got your figure and you're making money.
Tracee: So you think I should get an abortion?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Believe me, with Ralphie as the father, you would be doing this kid and the next few generations a favour.

- What?
- Nothing.
- You're sweet.
- Most guys wouldn't even give a shit.
- Well...
- I'm not most guys.

- It's just a habit.
- Well, stop it, alright?
- You're gonna be bald.
- It's obsessive compulsive.
- I'm gonna head upstairs.
- Don't go on account of me.
- I have that poly-sci paper anyway.

- It's a loan, I'm juicing her.
- Usually it's fake tits they want.
- Yeah, well, she don't need those, that's for sure.
- That kid's a thoroughbred.
- But, madonn', those choppers.
- A fucking train wreck.

- So, Meadow, what business is your father in?
- Actually, um, he's in waste management.
- Ah, toxic chemicals, medical waste, that sort of thing?
- Yeah, sort of, environmental cleanup.
- Let's give a big bada bing welcome to tracee.

- You gotta snap out of this, Caitlin.
- Maybe you need to talk to somebody.
- Yeah, well, I'm already taking those buspar pills.
- Well, maybe that's not enough.
- Where are you going?
- To the library.

- I'm writing my paper.
- You mind if I just sit and study then?
- I'm fine, really, it's just...
- You know, it's creepy up there alone.
- Um...
- Alright.

- Can't we be friends?
- Well, I'm not so sure that's such a good idea either.
- 'Cause, you know, you and ralphie...
- Yeah, ralphie.
- I'm glad your kid's okay.
- Let's go, Betty Crocker.

- This way she can grow up to be a cock sucking slob just like her mother.
- Are you out of your fucking mind?
- Guinea motherfucking piece of shit!
- That's right, that's right, get it all out.
- Get it all out, you little whore.

Ralph: Where's Tony?
Gigi: Gettin' his weasel greased.
Ralph: Oh, your kid brother's here?

- Leave me alone!
- I'm not gonna stop until you say it.
- Okay, okay, wait.
- I thought you were cute, alright?
- Ahh...
- I knew it.

- At this point?
- She thinks we're her friends.
- Well, you have to set limits.
- The girl was ruining our lives.
- Think about it, we couldn't do anything without her horning in.
- We certainly couldn't take her to see this.

- What man?
- Oh, a double.
- You tell him, sweetie.
- I like this girl!
- Women, women, women.
- Why was I born handsome instead of rich?

- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

- How fucking dare you!
- Take it easy.
- You don't think.
- You disrespect this place.
- That's the reason why you were passed the fuck over.
- It's my fault she's a klutz?

- Whoa, you're on the Poles tonight, honey.
- Why the hell's mandee in?
- Vip work, vip prices.
- It's 50 bucks to me, plus a blowjob later on.
- You know you're gonna make at least half a g m there.

- Look, honestly, you're too negative.
- It's like you have this underlying cynicism about everything.
- What are you talking about?
- I really didn't want to get into this.

- Holy fucking shit.
- Get a sheet, Chrissy, cover that up.
- Where is he?
- Inside.
- Go get him.

Tracee: I'm pregnant. It's Ralphie's.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Congratulations.
Tracee: What should I do? He acts like he doesn't give a shit.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: You ever think he's not acting?

- Fucking stunad, this guy.
- Did you like the bread?
- What?
- The datenut bread.
- I have recipes...
- Hey, sweetheart, not now, alright?

- Who?
- Who?
- You don't know him.
- He died, that's all.
- Work-related death.
- It's sad when they go so young.

Georgie: Hey Ralph!
Ralph: I have come to reclaim Rome... for my people.
Georgie: How ya doin'?
Ralph: [grabs Georgie by the neck, yelling] I have come to reclaim Rome... for my people!
Georgie: I don't get it. What do you mean?
Ralph: Fuckin' Gladiator, ya fuck!
Georgie: Oooh, the movie! I didn't see it.
Ralph: You're an asshole then.

Noah: [angrily, referring the low grade he received caused by Caitlin interrupting him] C fuckin minus and it's all her fault: for six hours I'm trying to work and she won't stop
Meadow: Tell me about it
Noah: The questions, the whining, the crazy God damn nonsense, I mean she starts crying about her economics class, she doesn't get it. So, I give her my notes from last year, I'm talking "primo" notes, I got an A but even that's a problem: she doesn't understand my writing
Noah: [impersonating Caitlin] What does this word mean?" Blah, blah
Meadow: Nothing's ever enough with her
Noah: I mean, I know I'm the RA but technically she's not even on the floor, C minus
Noah: [sarcastically, talking to himself] Very beautiful Noah
Meadow: It's not that bad, ok?
Noah: I want options when I graduate, I'm going to law school in two short years and C minus is fucked for me
Meadow: It's early in the semester: you'll make it up

- What are we, shon?
- Who we missing?
- Tracee.
- Left sick on Saturday, haven't seen her since.
- For three days?!
- Fucking twat.