The Best House of Cards, Season 5, Episode 4 Quotes

Seth: Those folks out there love their president.
Tom: I love pound cake. Doesn't mean it's good for me.

- I'll take the brown one.
- That's Patricia whittaker over there.
- Chairperson of the dnc.
- She slapped me once in a bar in Omaha.
- For the life of me, I can't tell you why.
- There's something wrong with Tennessee.
- Your date is either lying or denying.

- You don't have to spin me.
- How shall I say this?
- When I was single,
- I always picked the loser's party.
- I met the last Mrs. Hammerschmidt drowning in Tequila shots at the Bob dole ballroom.
- And here I am, single again.

[Stammers] I got to put on a suit.
- People will be here soon.
[Grunts] Will...
- Can't you let yourself feel it?

- You can do it harder.
[Groans] Even harder than that.

Tom: When I was single, I always picked the loser's party. I met the last Mrs Hammerschmidt drowning in tequilla shots at the Bob Dole ballroom. And here I am, single again.

- You think we should?
- I can't weigh in on this.

- The bureau cannot guarantee the safety of these centers.
- Unacceptable. Find kalabi.
- The governor does not wanna have to institute a curfew this late in the game.
- And, Mitch...
[Stammers] Uh, yes, sir.
- You are not closing the polls.

Francis: [on the phone] I wanted to be the first to tell you congratulations, Mr. President-elect.
Will: Well, thank you, Mr. President.
Francis: [to the camera] Oh, what, you think I learned nothing from Al Gore?

- So we're shaking hands today?
- I think it's best we keep it like that.
- Well, shake it like you mean it.

- Do you realize we have every intention of winning today?
- Sure.
- But then what?

[So ftly] Better?
- Yeah, a little.
- It's the first time I've fucked a president.
- Oh, don't say that.
- Marshall said...
- I'm not a president yet.
- Almost.

- I'm choosing my words very carefully here.
- You need to get ready.
- Today's gonna be a good day.
- You can sleep when you get to the white house.
- Or maybe not.
- Get yourself together, will.
- I'll see you in a bit.

- This dangerous world left you no choice.
- Oh. Thank you.
- Governor, I was just handed the classified intel.
- Are you on a secure server?
- Yes, I am.
- Please hold.
- I'm sending the files over right now.

- Undennood's gonna lose tomorrow.
- He's done.
- Leann: This is 9:00 am. Turnout in our base precincts or swing?
- Base.
- Shit.
- It's low.
- What do you mean, "low"?
Francis: This is our house.
- We are not leaving.

[last lines]
Francis: [in the Oval Office] There's no coming back from this.
Claire: Oh, I know exactly what we're about to do.
Francis: If we fail, it's on both of us. I won't be able to protect you.
Claire: [takes deep breath] And what a relief that will be - for both of us.
Francis: The American people don't know what's best for them. I do. I know exactly what they need. They're like little children, Claire. Children we never had. We have to hold their sticky fingers and wipe their filthy mouths. Teach them right from wrong. Tell them what to think and how to feel and what to want. They even need help writing their wildest dreams, crafting their worst fears. Lucky for them they have me, they have you.
[takes deep breath]
Francis: Underwood, Underwood, 2016... 2020... 2024... 2028... 2032... 2036... One nation, Underwood.
Claire: [opens the door] Doug, LeAnn, do you have a moment?

- And that is a terrifying proposition.
- Well, I may need you to stay around the white house a bit longer, Cathy, until this situation is resolved.
- Of course.
- I was only saying, it's been a good run.

- But once we do get there, we are going to shake the hand of each and every one of you, to thank you for all the extraordinary work that you've done for us.
- That's right, a round of applause all the way around.
- And we'll see you all at the party a little later.

- Why did you ask him to leave?
- Because I just wanted to look in your eyes one more time before we do this.
- Francis, we're doing this.

- Never a dull moment in this country.
- Will wishes he could be here himself, but we've been advised that would go against protocol.
- I know you're disappointed that the change you were hoping for...
- That you voted for, has to wait a little longer.

- Could you rub my temples for a moment?
- Of course.
- No, actually the pain is right behind my eyes.
- Could you just rub my eyes for me?
- But you hate that.
- I know, but I think I'll like it this time.

- How much time do we have?
Leann: Ohio closes in two hours.
- And most people voted this morning.
- Some of these states are baked in already.
- Claire and I need the room for a moment.
Doug: Yes, sir.
- Leann, we'll call you back.
Leann: Yes, sir.

- How's that?
- So you want me to just head over to the ballroom?
- I do like looking at you across a large room.
- Victory.
- This is for when you win.
- I wrote a concession speech as well.

- Are you ready
- To catch me?
- Doug, leann, do you have a moment?

- You're about as tough an opponent as they come, Francis.
- Well, I've had a lot of practice.
- Now, you be sure to give my regards to Hannah and the children.
- Thank you, Mr. President.
- I'm sure I'll be calling on you for advice in the very near future.
- Well, I look foward to that.

- I used to go to this cabin up in Maine.
- The windows don't close properly.
- You can smell the ocean all summer long.

- Trust me.
[Scoffs] Bullshit.
Reporter: [On TV] Voting centers all across the state are being shut down...
- And anyone not in their homes by 8:30 central time, or 9:30...
- Five o'clock wave from Philly.
- I think we're home.

Catherine: Imagine my surprise when the NSA called me about Muhammed Kalabi just moments before you did.
Francis: Situation is still unfolding.
Catherine: On election day?
[Dissatisfied Francis shakes his head]
Catherine: Francis, it's been quite a journey working with you.
Francis: Kalabi slipped into the country, and he's planning a terrorist attack against a voting centre in Tennessee.
Catherine: And that is a terrifying proposition.
Francis: Well, I may need you to stay around the White House a bit longer, Cathy, until this situation is resolved.
Catherine: Of course. I was only saying, it's been a good run.

Leann: I'm having déjà vu. You ever get that?
Doug: Are you seriously asking me about déjà vu?
Leann: Never mind. It's gone. You never get déjà vu? Everybody does.
Doug: I don't.
Leann: Don't look so worried, Doug. You just felt familiar for a second.

[Sighs] "There's still time"?
- There's still time for what?
- What are you doing?
- You and your husband.
- Getting ready to win an election.
- I see the way you're acting.

- She can reach me if you feel I need to be there sooner rather than later.
- Uh, in case it's later,
- I want you to think four years down the road.
- I'm sorry?
- They trust you.
- Four years is no time.
- We have a car waiting.

- I don't care if he loses.
- I'm not talking about the election.
- I'm talking about you.
- What will happen to you?
- You have everything you need.
- The pastebin link was sent to you.
- Where's leann?
- She's not here, and I'm short on time.