The Best Maureen Van Zandt Quotes

Carmela: [referring to having sex with Tony after her father's seventy fifth birthday party] Then he fell asleep right after. He did call me late the next morning: he sent flowers, but other than that, I haven't heard from him all week
Gabriella: What'd he say?
Carmela: That it was "nice", he was very sweet actually
Gabriella: So, you think what happened at the party was an overture that he wants to get back together?
Carmela: I don't know, maybe? His dropping AJ off later, this is the last thing I need to get into right now
Gabriella: Please, he never had it so good
Carmela: [after hearing him pull into their driveway] That's him
Gabriella: You two should talk, let me just pee

Dominic: [briefing them] Are we all here? Good afternoon, for those of you that don't know me, my name's Dominic and I'm alcoholic and an addict
Paulie: [irritated] Don't forget scumbag
Dominic: As some of you don't know, I've also been in recovery going on four years. I joined AA in prison and frankly, it saved my life. Now, we're all here today because we have something in common: not only we share a certain background in culture, we also care about Chris and want to help him with his heroin addiction. Has anyone of you guys been involved in an intervention before?
Silvio: We caught our daughter smoking pot once but...
Gabriella: [interrupts him] Not really, no
Dominic: No problem. An intervention is a non-judge mental confrontation: a care-front-tation, we call it. Now what I need from you guys is make a list of specific times where Christopher's drug use impacted on you directly. For example, Adriana, is it?
Dominic: [after she nods] You would say something like this, Christopher, last Monday, you came from work high, belligerent, and you were physically abusive to me
Adriana: What if his high when we try to talk to him?
Dominic: Then we wait until his sober. During my first intervention, Steven Patrono waited ten hours for me to sober up
Silvio: Your first intervention?
Dominic: In 1997, I suffered a relapse, as heroin addicts, alcoholics suffer a fairly high recidivism rate
Paulie: [sarcastically] Great, so his taking advice from a two-time loser?
Dominic: There are no losers in recovery

Rosalie: It's not just us. The president of the Unites States for crying out loud, look what his wife had to put up with, with the the blowjobs and the stained dress.
Angie: Hillary Clinton? I can't stand that woman.
Rosalie: I don't know. Maybe we could all take a page from her book.
Carmela: What, to be humiliated in public and then walk around smiling all the time? That is so false. I would dig a hole, I would climb into it, and I would not come out.
Rosalie: All I know is, she stuck by him and put up with the bullshit and in the end, what did she do? She set up her own little thing.
Gabriella: She did. She took all that negative shit he gave her and spun it into gold. You gotta give her credit.
Carmela: Well, that's true, isn't it?
Carmela: She's a role model for all of us.

Gabriella: [after entering his office] I'm so upset, I don't know what to say
Father: why? What's wrong?
Gabriella: what's wrong? Carmela is one of your biggest supporters and friends, how dare you let her suffer humiliation and embarrassment at the hands of an "outsider"?
Father: I don't know what you mean
Gabriella: oh, you know "exactly" what I mean. Unfortunately, because of her husband's high profile in the "waste" industry, Carmela's the one who bears the brunt of these insults but there are many of us that were equally offended
Father: I am sorry, this is an open forum, you did hear me bring up that new study?
Gabriella: look, if that's your idea of a good luncheon speaker, I suggest you think about who really keeps this parish alive year after year

Carmela: So did you hear?
Gabriella: You're talkin' about the Bonpensieros, right?
Carmela: Hang on, Gab, call waiting. It might be Tony from Italy. Hello?
Rosalie: I didn't sleep a wink last night. My God. Isn't this awful?
Carmela: Did you tell Franny Altieri?
Rosalie: OOH! No. She's gonna shit when she hears this.

Gabriella: [to Carmela] Really, though, how dare he? After all you've done for this parish!
Carmela: [resigned] What are you gonna do?
Gabriella: [after a long pause] Well, I'm gonna cut him a new one.