The Best The Office, Season 2, Episode 16 Quotes

- What it's like to walk a mile in Oscar's shoes, or try on Phyllis' pants.
- Next time you're in town, give us a call. Stop on by.
- I'm sure you'll be greeted by a big smile, and a "how're you doing, pal?"
- Maybe even one ofangela's famous brownies.
- And you'll know that you're home.

- I mean, I know that it's
- Valentine's day or whatever.
- But there's totally no pressure at all of any kind whatsoever. So...
- I can't tonight.
- I have plans with my friends.
- Okay, that's cool. Okay.
- I completely understand. Cool.
- Okay.

Pam: It's just that I had to sit here all day while Phyllis got, like, an entire garden delivered to her.
Roy: What? You're mad at me?
Pam: I mean, I know that we said, "No big gifts," but I was kind of hoping you'd get me something for Valentine's Day.
Roy: Well, Valentine's Day isn't over. Let's get you home and you are gonna get the best sex of your life.

- I know.
- It was borderline at best.
- And jan is a fantastic executive and has all the integrity in the world and...
- I'm really sorry, and that will never happen again.
- That's fine.
- Let's just... just forget it.
- Okay. Good.

- Do you understand?
- Yes, I'm sorry.
- I'll fix it. I will talk to him. I'll talk to David.
- Surely, you cannot be serious.
- I am serious.
- "And don't call me Shirley."
- Airplane!

- Yes. Absolutely, David.
- Let me get that for you. I...
- Yeah. Can you sign?
- Oscar.
- Nothing for me? Join the club.
- Vvhositfiom? Mymom.

Michael: I would love to live in New York someday. It's a big dream of mine. Work at corporate with Jan. That would be awesome. Go to Broadway shows, eat hot dogs. Scranton is great, but... New York is like Scranton on acid. No, on speed. No, on steroids.

- Hey, Pam. You heart NY, right?
- You want me to pick you up anything?
- That's okay. All right.
- The best present would be, you do a good job in front of the new cfo.
- Dude. I'm going to nail it.
- Me in New York? Oh, I own that city. "Forget about it!"
- See you.

- It's gonna be great.
- What's this? What is this?
- I don't know. It's on your desk.
- Yeah, but who put it here?
- And for what purpose?
- It was there when I sat down.
- "Happy Valentine's day."

Dwight: Women are like wolves. If you want a wolf, you have to trap it. You have to snare it. And then you have to tame it. Keep it happy. Care for it. Feed it. Lovingly, the way an animal deserves to be loved. And my animal deserves a lot of loving.

Michael: Well, here we go. On our way to New York. New York, New York. City so nice they named it twice. Manhattan is the other name.

- which was just above our pre-year targets. Thanks very much.
- Thank you. Okay, Michael.
- What is a business?
- Is it a collection of numbers and sales reports?
- Sure. But, as you know,
- David, and jan, it is much more.

- Let's do it.
- No, that's all right. Spend money on her instead of giving it to us, that's fine.
- No. I didn't even have a seat for you anyway.
- Yeah.
- All right, man.
- Okay, have a good night. Bye.