50 Best Robbie Sinclair Quotes

Robbie: Gee, Dad, I thought you loved the dome. You said it was going to make us rich.
Earl: Yeah well now it's going to make us need plastic surgery and a relocation program.
Robbie: You can't possibly believe that.
Baby: [wearing a disguise] Not the baby!

Robbie: [as Baby tries to eat a cookie] I'm in charge, and I'm telling you, put the cookie down!

Robbie: Hey, birthday boy, help is on the way.
[laughs]
Robbie: Here you go, bro, a little something I made for you in shop class.
Baby: Gimme, gimme, gimme!
Robbie: Ow! I think I lost my finger.
[Baby Sinclair unwraps a present]
Fran: Oh, a toy train.
Robbie: Yeah, I worked on it all year. I even whittled little forks and spoons for the dining cart.
[laughs]
Fran: Wasn't that thoughtful?
Baby: [gets angry and smashes the toy train with a hammer] Want something from the store!
Fran: Oh!
[Baby Sinclair cries]
Robbie: Gee, that clear varnish doesn't protect like it's supposed to.
Charlene: Oh, I'm sorry.
Baby: [angrily] I'm not happy! I'm not happy! I'M NOT HAPPY!

Fran: [Regarding Robbies Spikes] Look, it's getting Late Earl, why Can't we just discuss this after Dinner?
Earl: He's not Eating Dinner in My House with those Spikes!
Robbie: Obviously, I can't do anything Right. My Room's a Mess, My Spikes are too long, and My Posture Stinks! I mean... why is it that everything that I do is so wrong?
Earl: I was gonna ask You the same thing...
Robbie: You know, I never asked to be Hatched in this Stupid Family.
Earl: Well then... nobody is keeping You here.
[Earl opens the Door, and Robbie Leaves]
Robbie: FINE!
Earl: [Aloud] Don't You walk away from Me!

Earl: [about hurling Ethyl] Without this, my life means nothing.
Robbie: Well then I guess my life must mean nothing, because when your time comes, I'm not throwing you.
Earl: Why the hell not?
Robbie: Because you're my father, just because you get old doesn't mean you stop being my father.

Robbie: Dad, this was supposed to be a big fun day and Mom's trying to kill it for all of us. Who's the boss around here?
Earl: Yeah. Fran?
Fran: [yelling] What?
Earl: She is.

Man Over P.A.: Attention, Robbie Sinclair, your father is here.
Robbie: That's it, I'm gonna tell him where to get off this time.
Man Over P.A.: He looks really steamed.
Robbie: Gulp.

Robbie: Everyday it's the same thing. He comes home and says "Franny, get me a beer." And then he yells at me.
Earl: Oh not true. Sometimes I yell at you first.

Earl: [after Robbie and Spike leaves, thinks about what Spike told him] I see it all now - it's all so clear!
Fran: [comes in the kitchen] Earl, is everything all straightened out now?
Earl: You bet it is! It was YOU!
Fran: Me?
Earl: You foul temptress; weaver of spells!
Fran: [offended] What?
Earl: Don't try to cloud my mind! These boys are mere victims of the treachery of you females.
Fran: [furiously] Where's Spike?
Earl: He's right, uh...
[Earl turns around only to see Robbie come back in]
Fran: Did you let Spike just walk out of this room?
Earl: [stammers] Uh, well, I, I, I...
Fran: [goes even more furious] Did you lose control of the entire situation!
Earl: Why lose control? I'm the mighty Megalosaurus!
[Fran growls at him]
Earl: [nervously] Yes, dear...
Fran: Grr... Robbie, go to your room!
Robbie: But dad said I...
Fran: I don't care what your father said! You're grounded until further notice!
Robbie: Okay, okay, yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am!
[Robbie rushes to his room]
Robbie: [distantly] Grouch!

Monster: Ah, you want to negotiate?
Robbie: Yeah.
Monster: Fine, I'll negotiate. I'll negotiate after I eat you!
[all crying]
Monster: Mwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Robbie: Well, at least we have a dialogue going. Ha.

[Ethyl is happy because Earl has been challenged to a fight to the death by an animal nine times his size]
Robbie: But I like Dad.
Grandma: No, you're just used to him.

Earl: Robbie, ask me another one.
Robbie: Dad, you haven't gotten one right yet.
Earl: I'm finding my rhythm. Go ahead, ask me. Ask me.
Robbie: Okay, okay, what can fish do under water that dinosaurs can't?
Earl: Sing.
Robbie: Wrong. Breathe.
Earl: We can't breathe under water? That stinks.

Robbie: Dad, I'm here with a girl. It might help if you didn't make me look like the world's biggest weenie.
Earl: Well pardon me, Mr. Dignified, I didn't mean to belittle you as you were about to hit the ball up the clown's pants.

Earl: I have three kids, and I love them.
Robbie: Hey, Dad.
Earl: Shut up, I'm talking.

Fran: It's too loud!
[turns off the TV]
Fran: And I don't like the values they portray.
Robbie: Mom, you're overreacting.
Baby: Beer! Cigarettes! Chicks!
Robbie: He could've heard that anywhere.
Earl: [arrives] Where is he? Where is he? Ah, there's the birthday boy! Tomorrow's the big day! Yay.
Baby: [chuckles] Yay! Presents! Presents!
Earl: Hey! You betcha! Presents, hats, streamers, the works for your first birthday. Even a pony!
Baby: Pony?
Earl: That's right! A big, juicy one, grilled to perfection.

Neighbor: You Sinclair kids come over here at the middle of the night on the 31st of October and expect me to give you candy? GET LOST.
Robbie: Hmm, next time maybe we should wear costumes.
Robbie: Naw.

Earl: [Regarding what the Plant has led them to] You know, maybe your Mother is right, throwing our Lives away for some cheap high does have a downside, so... have we agreed, no more Plant?
Robbie: Sigh, no more Plant...
Earl: ...and no more throwing our Lives away either?
Robbie: No more throwing our Lives away.

Robbie: Can I have a moment's peace? I was at work all day.
Fran: Robbie, you are the supreme male. These are your responsibilities now. If you can't handle them, maybe you should turn them over to someone with more maturity.
Earl: [wearing goofy glasses] Whoa, Fran, I can see your underwear.

Earl: [presenting the toy car wrapped in paper] Son, this present is only for good little boys. You can have it, if you promise to be good.
Baby: [Faking Innocence] I'll be good... I promise.
[a golden halo appears on top of baby's head and a twinkle happens in his eye]
Fran: It's not right, Earl, bribing a child to behave!
Earl: ...and if it works?
Fran: It's a short sighted, stop gap, quick fix solution...
Earl: You don't have to sell me on it.
[Fran grunts irritably]
Earl: Here, son, look! A car!
Baby: [excited] A car! Oh, boy!
Earl: [giggles] Come on.
[grabs the Baby and puts him in the kiddie car]
Robbie: Gee Dad, you never bribed me with anything neat like that.
Earl: You were never rotten enough to deserve it.

Robbie: The competition looks pretty tough, why did you see Billy Melman's project where you clap and a lamp turns on? I mean THAT'S genius. How am I going to compete with that?
Spike: Oh, well you know Billy, he uses substandard material. You know, the kind that tend to shatter when broken over his head. Yo, Billy, let me see that lamp!

Robbie: I want to win this fair and square.
Spike: How have you managed to stay alive so long?

Earl: You hear that? You've corrupted them. Now I want you out of my house and out of our lives.
Pearl: Oh, why don't you lighten up?
Charlene: Yeah.
Earl: Lighten up? Oh. You kids would like that, wouldn't you? You'd like it if I acted like Pearl. Sashay into town, sing a few songs, give everyone a good time. You'd all just love that.
Charlene: It'd be a big improvement.
Robbie: Yeah. We'd like you better.
Fran: Sounds exciting.
Pearl: Yeah.
Earl: Well, Pearl. I hope you're satisfied. You've successfully turned my family against me.
Charlene: Huh?
Earl: Your work here is done.
Pearl: I'm not turning anybody against you, Earl. You've done that all by yourself. Huh.
[Pearl Sinclair leaves]

Robbie: So, you're making a scent?
Charlene: Yeah. I've got to. My real scent attracted a janitor.

Robbie: Dad, you're not being rational.
Earl: Oh and I suppose the crazed mob on the front lawn isn't rational either?

Earl: Why am I so selfish? Why?
Robbie: I see something, hand me the binoculars.
Earl: No, they're mine.

Baby: Okay, Georgie. Can I have my hug now?
Earl: [as Georgie] Oh, sure, special little guy.
[chuckles as Georgie]
Earl: Assuming my head doesn't fall off.
Charlene: Yay.
[Earl kisses Baby Sinclair as Georgie]
Robbie: Aw, isn't that special?
Baby: Yay!

Earl: They're a big company, Fran, I think they know what they're doing.
Robbie: Gee, Dad, it sounds like you've been brainwashed or something.
Earl: Exactly, and that brainwashing has put the food on the table and the clothes on your back.
Fran: And now the suitcase in your hand.
Earl: And a darn nice suitcase it is.

Earl: As you can see, I have separated all known dinosaur wisdom into three categories: animal, vegetable, rocks.
Robbie: Well, what about fire?
Earl: Vegetable.
Charlene: What about water?
Earl: Water is the opposite of fire, which we have previously established as a vegetable. What's the opposite of a vegetable? Fruit. So, water is a fruit! Fruit is not a vegetable, so it has to be either an animal or a rock. We know it's not an animal. Therefore, fruit is a rock.

Robbie: There is something I've been thinking about and I wouldn't mind hearing what the family thinks. I'm a little confused about the nature of reality.
Earl: ...No kidding?
Robbie: Right, like if a tree falls in the forest and nobody's around to see it or hear it, did it actually fall?
Fran: Ooh, now that IS intriguing. Who can build on that?
[Earl gets up and heads out of the room]
Fran: Where are you going?
Earl: I'm going to see if the tree fell. I'll be back in a couple of days.
Fran: If you leave this house, I will NEVER talk to you again.
Earl: Throw in the rest of the family and you got yourself a deal.
[Fran gasps]

Robbie: Mommy, tell him to be supreme male again.
Earl: Can't make me.
Fran: Alright, that's enough from both of you.
[to Earl]
Fran: He can't handle the household, and it's time you started acting like an adult again.
Earl: Don't wanna!
Fran: We're going right down to the Office of Male Supremecy and get you reinstated as head of the house.
Earl: [childishly] Why should I?

Howard: [In Robbie's thoughts] And, on this unexpected holiday from school, thousands of very cool guys and totally hot babes spent the day frollicking in the ash. Having what many describe as "the MOST FUN EVER."
Robbie: Alright, that's it. I'm going outside.
Fran: [In Robbie's thoughts] I want you to stay in your room, finish that assignment, and have no fun for the rest of your life.
Robbie: Isn't she terrific? My mother, ladies and gentlemen?
Earl: [In Robbie's thoughts] How about a hand for the guy paying these heating bills?
Fran: Earl, get out of Robbie's thoughts and pay those bills.
Earl: Yes, dear. Sheesh.

Earl: [On TV as Georgie] Uh, Georgie has something special to say to all of you. You see, Georgie's not what you think.
Robbie: Dad?
Fran: Earl?
Earl: [On TV as Georgie] You see, you probably think that Georgie's just a sweet, loveable guy who likes to give everybody hugs, but... .

Charlene: Whoa! Refrigerator Day without presents is like... like two things that go together, only one of them isn't there, so the other one doesn't have the other thing to go with it!
Robbie: Who says you're not deep?

Charlene: I don't see why Monica's putting herself through this, couldn't she just find another job?
Robbie: You're missing the whole point: Monica's fighting against injustice, struggling for the rights of females everywhere.
Earl: Yeah? Write a song about it.

Earl: I thought I told you to mow the lawn.
Robbie: I told you, the lawn mower is broken.
Earl: Scissors. Cut it with scissors.
Robbie: Oh come on.
Earl: Geez you kids have it too easy. When I was your age we didn't have lawn mowers, we didn't have scissors, we had to get down on all fours and graze like a cow.
Robbie: Dad.
Earl: Mooooo.

Police: Everyone ready?
Decker: Yep.
Police: Count of three. One...
Robbie: No, no!
Police: ...two...
Howard: And we'll be right back after a few words from the makers of Happy Fluff candy.

Earl: [the family's huddled in the dark covered in blankets and using flashlights] Do you hear that?
Fran: No, what?
Earl: Shh, a low grumbling, like the earth getting ready to open up and swallow us. Don't you hear it?
Robbie: [unfazed] It's the icemaker.
Earl: Quiet you! You brought about a cataclysm against all life on Earth and I don't want to hear another word out of you!
Baby: Are we dead yet?
Fran: No.
Baby: Oh... when we gonna be dead?
Fran: Very soon dear.
Charlene: My, my flashlight went out! I think the batteries are dead!
Earl: Dead, they're dead! It's starting, the batteries are always the first to go!
Grandma: Earl, come here, let me tell you something.
Earl: What? What?
Grandma: [hits him with her cane] Get a hold of yourself!

Robert"Robbie": I wrote this song for a girl who used to ignore me, until I played it for her .

Fran: [arrives] Hi, I'm back from the market. I got nearly everything on Aubrey's list except the low-sodium goat cheese and the sugar-free tofu teething cookies.
[Earl sighs]
Aubrey: Perhaps you could pop out after supper and check other stores. By the way, did you manage to change the linens in my crib? They were left in quite a state by your previous child.
Fran: My previous child?
[cries]
Fran: Oh. Oh, no.
Earl: Oh. Come on, Franny. Our real son is celebrating his first birthday.
Fran: My baby is one year old, and I'm not there?
[wails]
Fran: I just want to crawl into the woods and die!
Earl: Cake time! Charlene, your mother wants some cake. Fran, hey! No wonder you're feeling down. You don't have a party hat.
Fran: Oh, my baby has been taken from me!
[cries]
Earl: Oh, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake! That's it, come on. Quick.
Charlene: Here you go, Mom.
[Earl chuckles nervously]
Fran: I want the knife. Give me the knife!
Charlene: What?
Earl: No cake. No cake. No cake.
Charlene: Hey, hey. Hey! What's the matter with Mom?
Earl: Well, she's overwhelmed with happiness.
[Fran cries and Earl sighs and smacks his teeth]
Robbie: Well, I got the tissues.
Earl: Give... .
Robbie: Huh?
Earl: No. Come on, sweetie. Now, cheer up. We're celebrating a new addition to our family.
[Fran blows her nose]
Earl: Everyone else is happy.
Robbie: I'm not.
Charlene: Me, either. The kid's a real zero. Oh, no offense.
Aubrey: None taken. Fortunately, I'm very well-adjusted.

Agent: Good afternoon, citizens.
Agent: Hail the Potato.
Earl: Hail.
Fran: Hail.
Agent: Son, we understand you're finding the transition to Potato-ism fraught and difficult.
Earl: Yeah.
Agent: It can be an anxious and puzzling time.
Agent: We're here to help.
Robbie: [the agents struggle Robbie Sinclair] Ow! Hey! Get your hands off me!
Fran: Earl, they're hurting him. Shouldn't we stop them?
Agent: The answer's no, lady. Look it up.
Robbie: Aw! Mom, Dad. Don't you see what's happening?
[the agents put toilet paper in his mouth and Fran gasps]
Agent: There you go. No more troubling questions.

Robbie: How could not howling at the moon bring an end to our days on earth?
Earl: Because if you don't howl, I'll kill ya.

Earl: This is terrible. I've failed my family. I'm nothing. I'm dirt.
Robbie: You're not dirt, Dad.
Earl: No, you're right, I'm beneath dirt. I look up to dirt. I wish I was dirt. Dirt laughs at me!
Fran: Earl, it'll be okay.
Earl: No it won't, Fran. This is gonna be the worst Refrigerator Day EVER.

Charlene: Oh, Officer Bettleheim?
Officer: What?
Charlene: Did I mention Robbie scratched the car when he rammed into your motorcycle?
Robbie: *You're dead*!
Officer: My... my *what*!

Robbie: These are my schoolbooks.
Charlene: [gasps] My diary!
Earl: Oh, come on now. We all have to make sacrifices if we want to remain a Fernhill family.
Fran: Ugh, that mug! That awful mug is the root of this whole mess. You're lucky you put in that security system or else I'd walk in there right now and smash it to pieces!
Earl: Fran! that mug, as you call it, has made us happier than we've ever been! If you weren't so angry you'd see that! Fran! Fran!
Baby: Bad mug.

Earl: I won't be home for dinner, Roy and I are going down to the mall to cruise the food court...
Robbie: Isn't it a work night?
Earl: But Roy is going.
Robbie: Well I'm not Roy's father. Oh I see, you're testing me. Well I think you're at an age where you're mature enough to make your own decisions.
Earl: Oh cool. Have some wax lips.

Robbie: [Trying to think up a science project] Let's see. Sneakers. What else? A pump. Sneakers with a pump in them.
[Thinks of a tire pump trying to pump up a sneaker]
Robbie: Naw what a stupid idea.

Baby: Robbie. Um, tell me a story.
Robbie: Life stinks, The End.

Earl: There are many customs that the Book of Dinosaur commands us to obey, but none as important as The Howling. Each month, on the evening of the full moon, every male dinosaur who has come of age is commanded to climb to the mountain top and howl his mightiest howl.
Robbie: Why?
Earl: Why what?
Robbie: Why do we do it?
Earl: We've been doing it that way for a million years. It is written in the Sacred Book of Dinosaurs.
Robbie: Well who wrote it there?
Earl: Some sacred guy!

Fran: Earl, he's our baby. A mother knows.
Robbie: I don't know. That nest is pretty suspicious.
Charlene: He doesn't really look like us.
Robbie: Yeah, he's pink. None of us is pink. Isn't that kind of weird?
Charlene: Very.

Robbie: It's a long story.
Officer: I like stories. I like 'em just fine.