The Best Norm Peterson Quotes

Cliff: So whats goin down, Norm?
Norm: My blood alcohol level.

Brian: [about Cliff] Hey, does he talk to people like that all the time?
Norm: Oh, he doesn't need people.

Cliff: I'm about ready to take off, there. How about you, Sky King?
Brian: Just one more pre-flight adjustment to make.
Cliff: What's that?
Brian: Would you two guys mind switching seats?
Cliff: Ah, I get it. Weight distribution of payload. Right you are.
[Gets up to change seats with Norm, all the while muttering]
Norm: Is this for safety reasons?
Brian: Oh, yeah. If he'd stayed up here, I'd've killed him.

Norm: [about Cliff] He's an okay guy, it just takes a little time to get used to him. I'm about two years away myself.

Martin: That's quite a mug callus you have there.
Norm: Judging from your grip, I'd say you were a can man.

Martin: The best thing is, on a summer's day, you open a cold one, and that foam runs down your hand and for a split second there, you're jealous of your own knuckles.
Norm: Oh yeah, yeah. I had no idea that you were a poet.

Norm: So, um, what time's the cocktail service start?
Brian: We don't have cocktail service.
Norm: You do now.
[grabs a can of beer out of his pocket and pulls the tab]

[Norm and Cliff from Boston, are taking a flight to Nantucket to go fishing. Brian is preparing for take-off]
Norm: I can't wait to get out on the water. Do you know how the fishing is over on Nantucket?
Brian: Oh, yeah, I hear they're biting like pitbulls at a mailman convention.
Norm: Hahahaha!
Cliff: [scowling at Brian] That's supposed to be funny?
Brian: I guess not.