The Best The Sopranos, Season 6, Episode 5 Quotes

- Sorry.
- My mom says I should count 10, but I never remember.

Johnny: [angrily to Allegra, referring to the seating arrangement for her wedding while they visit him in prison] you got Uncle Angelo at table nineteen?
Allegra: What? His with Aunt Connie
Johnny: And when he sees Aunt Loraine and the Haitian boyfriend sitting next to them?
Johnny: [angrily to Ginny] I thought you were on top of this?
Ginny: There's four hundred people John, I've had "other things" on my mind
Johnny: [raises his voice] And I'm idling away the hours?
Catherine: [going over her guest list] Who's not taking to who: this one can't see to that one
Eric: [hugs her] It's ok honey, take it easy
Catherine: You're the one who wanted a big wedding
Ginny: [chastising her] Catherine, your sister has enough to deal with without the commentary
Johnny: I'm sorry, I blew my stack, ok? We're gonna get through this as a family, dignified, proud, despite all the persecution, and roadblocks and when I say family, that includes you too Eric
Eric: Thank you, John
Johnny: Thank you who?
Eric: Thank you... dad
Johnny: [to Allegra] You, I want you to relax, make sure you eat
Johnny: [to Ginny] You too
Ginny: Me? No, thank you, I am eight pounds away from my goal, I fitting into that dress if it kills me
Catherine: [irritated] Jesus, can we talk about anything in this family, besides food?

Tony: Well, here I am: back
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Yup
Tony: So, let me ask you right off, is there any chance for a mercy fuck?
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: [Remains silent]
Tony: I'm just kidding
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: How are you feeling?
Tony: You went to medical school, a gunshot wound is everything they told you it was
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: And emotionally?
Tony: I'm happy to be alive
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Have you spoken to your uncle since it happened?
Tony: No, and I won't. I finally get to sleep on my own bed tonight. I got a hospital bed in the house for the last month and a half ago
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Is sleeping difficult?
Tony: [Shakes his head] Tylenol helps
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: What about dreams? Night terrors? Anything like that?
Tony: Gloom is your business and business is good
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: You were shot, Anthony by a member of your family
Tony: I know
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: And unless I know absolutely nothing about what I'm doing, I think you and I have a lot to talk about. Are you familiar with the term Post Traumatic Stress?
Tony: I get it ok? My uncle tried to kill me, for the second time. Three strikes and I'm out right? And who knows, maybe I am suppressing things but right now I feel each day is a gift, I told my sister that and that's how it's going to stay
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Just pick up where we left off before this all happened
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: AJ
Tony: Believe it or not things got worse with that kid, flunked out of college. He waited until I was in a coma
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Didn't you leave Seaton Hall after a semester and a half?
Tony: Alright fine why can't he copy some of the good things about me?
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Does he have a job?
Tony: Blockbuster: the first stop of the shit bird express
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: In some ways this shooting may have provided him an opportunity to learn from your mistakes
Tony: My mistakes? I got caught up in domestic violence, you think it can't happen to you but it does
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: But I was referring to the bigger picture. The ready access to guns, the use of violence to solve disputes because of the nature of your work, your uncle's work
Tony: I told you I didn't want to talk about my uncle
Dr. Jennifer Melfi: Fine, but for now is it safe to say there are worse ways to earn money than by stocking shelves at Blockbuster?
Tony: Yeah, there are

Johnny: [During Allegra's wedding reception] obviously I couldn't visit you in the hospital, when I heard what happened I was devastated
Tony: [Eventually asking how much Allegra's wedding's cost] that's life huh? Seriously what's the damages here? What am I in for with Meadow?
Johnny: Not counting the honeymoon? Four twenty-five
Tony: So adjusted for inflation I'm looking at "half a rock"
Johnny: It's all for it, what we put in? The grind? For things like this? Listen I heard Phil came to see you?
Tony: [Noticing the US Marshall's escorting John are standing nearby, realizing they need to go somewhere else to talk] let's go say hello to your dad
Tony: [after greeting John's father and sitting down at their table] I'm going to say a few things and these pricks are watching, I'm going to make it look like I'm talking to your dad and them
Tony: [Referring to the hit on Rusty] What you asked me to do, with the little guy, I can't do it
Johnny: This fuckin prick, his disruptive. He doesn't have the balls to step up himself
Tony: So just keep him away from Phil
Johnny: His a "cancer", I can't let it spread
Tony: Well, your going to have to use one of your own "doctors"
Johnny: Oh I'd love to, believe me. But my position isn't completely solidified. When Carmine died, Rusty could've been boss, he should've been but he didn't want the responsibility
Tony: Like I advised you, say no more, it's too fuckin late now anyway
Johnny: I need your help Tony, some of these guys, my captains. If they find out I'm behind the move against them it'd make things worse. I can't take that risk while I'm in jail
Tony: So I'm supposed to put myself at risk? Share the same fuckin jail cell as you? Forget it John
Johnny: It's Allegra's wedding, the way things are, I don't know if I'll be around for Catherine's
Tony: Look I know your going through a rough time right now alright?
Johnny: Then do me this favor
Tony: OK I'll take care of it
Johnny: I won't forget it

Carmela: [while counting money at their kitchen table] Allegra Sacrimoni, getting married: were we not just at her christening?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [jokingly] 1980, fifty-pound bundle of joy
Carmela: She'll be a beautiful bride Tony
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [before gesturing to Meadow] All brides are beautiful, wait until this one gets married
Carmela: [to Tony] How much are we giving? So, I can write it down
Meadow: You keep tabs on gifts? How sentimental
Carmela: That's how it's done Meadow
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: So, we can know if they "stiff" us when your big day comes
Carmela: Exactly
Meadow: What is this pressure?
Carmela: I know you'd to think it's me pressuring you but the reality is it's your father that keeps this going
Meadow: Please, like you're aren't desperate to have a grandchild
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Any thoughts on when you and Finn are tying the knot?
Meadow: This discussion is over
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Look, sweetie, it's just what I've been through, it changes the way you think and holding my grandkids, your kids in my lap, all of a sudden, it's very important to me

- What do you got for me, counselor?
- The brioni.

- Mr. Sacrimoni, I'm deputy feathem,
- U.S. marshal service.
- This is my partner deputy Mayweather.
- We're here to escort you to the wedding today.
- Gentlemen.

- All right, you'll need to step out and remove your shoes, sir.
- Oh, come on!
- It's all right.
- Tony, Tony!
- Daddy!
- A.J., get him a chair!

- We have been very lucky, Tony.
- The house, the kids, what we just went through at the hospital.
- You make your own luck in life.
- I'll stop by tomorrow.

- for the first time anywhere, let's give a huge hand and a lot of love to...
- Mr. and Mrs. Eric dibenedetto!
- Ladies and gentlemen, for their first dance as man and wife,
- Allegra and Eric have chosen the lovely...

- The government did that?
- Mm-hmm.
- You okay?
- Yeah, it's hot.
- Almost there.
- All metal objects in the tray, sir.
- Jesus Christ!
- Arms outstretched, please.

Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: He's a come-from-behind kind of guy.

- Welcome home, t.
- Come here, you malingerer you.
- Easy, easy, easy.
- Great to have you back, t.
- Fucking great to be back.
- Sit, ton', I'll clear your spot.
- We got you your bialy as soon as we heard you were coming in today.
- Nuke that Joe so it's hot.

- John wants things to point away from the family.
- You know what? Tell him no.
- Time and again
- I've done his bidding.
- It's time to set some limits.
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
- Be well.

- You don't wanna what?
- You don't wanna what?
- This fucking guy, huh?
- Fucking Philadelphia lawyer.
- Jesus!
- Don't do it!
- No, don't do it!
- My arm!

- He's always like this at weddings.
- You make me sound rude. Crab cakes.
- I told you I don't feel good.
- They don't keep in this heat.
- Vito, let's go.
- Francesca, come on.
- Good night.

Judge: the government's own neuropsychologist clearly finds evidence of dementia
Prosecutor: evidence "consistent" with dementia
Judge: nonetheless, I'm going to "recommend" he be sent to a prison psychiatric facility for further evaluation
Zev: he'll only be "warehoused" in a public facility. Your Honor, we ask that Mr. Soprano be sent to a private "locked" facility
Prosecutor: [sarcastically] why not a resort in Antigua?
Zev: you want his mental state improved, so you can put him on trial? Just let him go to a place where he can get better

- Rusty!
- Rusty!
- You don't answer, someone calls you?
- Look at this shit now.

- What I been through, it changes the way you think.
- Holding my grandkids...
- Your kids...
- On my lap...
- All of a sudden, it's very important to me.

- Ho! You don't signal?
- Hey, fuck you!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Honey.
- Go back to sleep.
- I'm gonna take a shower.

Linda: The defendant's request for temporary release from federal custody to attend his daughter's wedding is ludicrous. Mr. Sacrimoni is a known member of organized crime at the helm of a vast criminal conspiracy
Ron: I notice your wearing a wedding ring Ms. Vaughn, was your father at your wedding?
Linda: My father wasn't awaiting trial on forty-seven RICO predicates including murder
Judge: Mr. Sacrimoni, your application is granted on the following conditions: you'll be released for six hours for the church service and the partying thereafter. During the entirety of the six hours you will be escorted by U.S. Marshals, the cost of their presence, transportation, and the cost of metal detection screening equipment is to be borne by you at your own expense. You will consume no alcohol or other intoxicating substances, do you understand and agree to these conditions?
Johnny: I do your Honor, and thank you

- Forget it, John.
- It's Allegra's wedding, Tony.
- The way things are,
- I don't know if I'll be around for Catherine's.
- I know you're going through a rough time right now, all right?
- Then do me this favor, Tony.

- Please join our bride and groom on the dance floor.
- How you doing over there?
- I'm okay.
- Wanna dance?
- Really?
- It's a slow one.

- Sal, please, it's a fucking joke.
- Right, sure.
- Say hi to your wife.
- I'm serious. I'm... sal, please.
- Don't say nothing, sal!
- Fuck those jerks.
- What do you care what they think?
- What? Leave me the fuck alone.

- It was good.
- Tired, though.
- You wanna take a nap?
- Smells good.
- Downy fresh.
- God, this feels great.
- It does.

- People see only what you allow them to see.
- Yeah, I been thinking the same thing.
- Thanks for the advice.
- Glad to be of service.
- Bring that.
- Come on, come on, come on!
- Where you going?

- If I did it, the fucking gun malfunctioned.
- It was old, okay?
- I should have cleaned it.
- Try to get some sleep.
- You'll feel better in the morning.
- Ladies and gentlemen, at this time our lovely bride will dance with her father.

- You want, I'll make you a program.
- There was a time when I could bench over 300 lbs.
- With a major head cold one time, I did it.
- You cough with weights like that over your head, you crush your neck.
- I guess I don't gotta tell you.

- It's three o-fucking clock.
- Is Tony all right?
- That's why I'm calling you.
- Checking in.
- Last I saw, he was having dessert.
- All right, then.
- Everything else okay?
- Yeah.
- Call me on my cell, you need anything.

Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: You make your own luck in life.

- What did the guy say?
- Our friend from the other place, he talked to the guy?
- What's his name, thelocalguy.
- Yeah, yeah, I know.
- Hold on.
- Yep, I see it. Thank you, ro.

- That includes transportation, sir.
- You fucking kidding me?
- I tried, John. They won't budge.
- Can he have some cake at least?
- You can pack some to take with you, if you'd like.
- Heartless pricks.
- Out front in 20.

- Thank you, gentlemen.
- Okay, corrado.

Deputy: Mr. Sacramoni, I'm Deputy Featham, US Marshals Service, this is my partner Deputy Mayweather. We're here to escort you to the wedding today
Johnny: [nods] Gentlemen
Deputy: [after entering the holding cell] The order by the court, your release is at our discretion. So, based on your behavior and any mitigating factors, we can elect to bring you back early
Johnny: [while looking at the dress shoe his lawyer brought, to Ron] Patten leather?
Ron: It's tuxedo
Johnny: [to Ron, irritated] Have you read an issue of GQ in the past three or four years?

- for richer and for poorer...
- In sickness and in health, forsaking all others, so long as we both shahhve.
- In sickness and in health, forsaking all others, so long as we both shall live.

- I thought you were sick.
- Go to bed.
- I'll see you later.
- Maybe too much.
- Don't think I want any less.
- Do you love me?
- I think I do.

- Ho, get the skip a chair.
- I don't want a chair. I'm fine.
- Ton', how you doing?
- What are you weighing these days?
- Don't ask. 265.
- Let's go.

- What do you got for me, Nicky?
- Let met get my wallet.
- Fucking skeeve, this shit.

Phil: [after Johnny Sack bursts into tears after being arrested by the FBI in front of everyone] I'll tell you one thing and I'm not ashamed to say it, my estimation of John Sacrimoni as a man just fucking plummeted.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Give him a break, will ya? It's an emotional day.
Phil: To cry like a woman? It's a fucking disgrace!
Paulie: It's fucking coach turned into a pumpkin.
Phil: Even Cinderella didn't cry!
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Look, when it comes to daughters, all bets are off. I've seen tougher guys than John cry at weddings.
Phil: OK, but let me ask you this: if they can make him cry, and if he's that weak, what the fuck else can they make him do?
Christopher: I gotta agree with Phil, Tone.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: [angrily] Oh you do, do ya?
Wedding: Terrible out there, huh?
Phil: He's an emotional man. LOVES his daughter.

- You talk to vito?
- Huh? I called him two times.
- He never called me back.
- You try the house?
- 'Cause he called me just the other night.
- Hungry, t.? You want, I'll have bissell fix you a sandwich.
- No, no, I'm good. I'm good.

- I'm looking at half a rock.
- What's it all for, though, Tony, huh?
- What we put in, the grind.
- Isn't that for things like this?
- Yeah.
- So I heard Phil came to see you.
- Let's go say hello to your dad.