Top 50 Quotes From Jarhead

[in an NBC suit]
Troy: [in a Darth Vader voice] Luke, come over to the Dark Side.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [to Swofford after a football hit his head during the game in NBC-suits] Swofford, I guess you call that using your head, huh?
[smiles to reporters]
Staff Sgt. Sykes: Using his head...

Anthony: [voice over narration] Suggested techniques for the Marine to use in the avoidance of boredom and loneliness: Masturbation. Rereading of letters from unfaithful wives and girlfriends. Cleaning your rifle. Further masturbation. Rewiring Walkman. Arguing about religion and meaning of life. Discussing in detail, every woman the Marine has ever fucked. Debating differences, such as Cuban vs. Mexican, Harleys vs. Hondas, left- vs. right-handed masturbation. Further cleaning of rifle. Studying of Filipino mail order bride catalog. Further masturbation. Planning of Marine's first meal on return home. Imagining what the Marine's girlfriend and her man Jody are doing in the hay, or in the alley, or in a hotel bed.

[repeated line]
Troy: Welcome to The Suck.

D.I. Fitch: What the fuck are you even doing here?
Anthony: Sir, I got lost on the way to college, sir.

Sgt. Siek: Swofford? Swofford?
Anthony: Yeah?
Sgt. Siek: What the fuck? You sick?
Anthony: No, sir. I just got this stomach-thing...
Sgt. Siek: Staff Sergenat Siek. I'm with Surveillance and Target Acquisition. STA. I heard it took six guys to pull that little branding trick on you. And your file says that you ain't dumb either. So you better get unsick most motha fucking rikey-tick, cause' there's a chance that you could be a scout sniper!
Sgt. Siek: [picks up Swofford's book] What the fuck is this?
Sgt. Siek: "The stranger from Camus". That's some heavy dope right there, marine!

Anthony: I wanted the pink mist.

Kruger: [referring to photo of Swoff's girlfriend] I'm storing that for later!

Anthony: [shouting at news van leaving] Come back soon, now you hear!

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [to the Marines] We've all been taught that; "Thou shalt not kill." But hear this: FUCK-THAT-SHIT!

D.I. Fitch: [to a whole squad of Marines] You are no longer black, or brown, or yellow, or red! You are now green! You are light green! Or dark green! Do you understand?
All: Sir, yes, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Swofford!
Anthony: Sir, yes, sir!
D.I. Fitch: You the maggot whose father served in Vietnam?
Anthony: Sir, yes, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Out-standing! Did he have the balls to die there?
Anthony: Sir, no, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Too fucking bad! He ever talk about it?
Anthony: Sir, only once, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Good! Then he wasn't lying!

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [to the dead Marine] I told you to keep your fucking head down! If you'd listened to me, you'd still be fucking alive right now, stupid fuck!

Anthony: My combat action has commenced.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: Will you shut the fuck up! There is no bugle program! You sizzle-dick motherfucker! Who do you think you are, some kind of Kenny G or some shit?
Anthony: No, Staff Sergeant.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: Good.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [looking at Oil Fires] I could be working with my brother right now. He's got a dry-wall business in Compton. Does the inside of office buildings; you know, the metal studs. I could be his partner, said he'd give me that brand new Dodge Ram Charger. You know, the 318 Magnum? The beast? All indoor work, too, lots of AC. I could sleep with my wife every night, fuck her, maybe; take my kids to school every morning. And I'd run his crews, too, probably increase productivity 40 to 50%. Make $100K a year. Do you know why I don't? Because I love this job. I thank God for every fucking day he gives me in the corps, oorah.

All: This is my rifle, this is my gun. This is for fighting and this is for fun.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: Now to the rest of you, do you have what it takes to be the meanest, the cruelest, the most sadist unforgiving mother fuckers in God's cruel kingdom?
All: Yes, Staff Sergeant.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: Will you be able to one day say, "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the baddest mother fucker in the God damn valley?"
All: Yes, Staff Sergeant.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: We shall fucking see.

Anthony: [voice over narration] I was hooked.

Anthony: Field fuck!
Reporter: What did he just say?
Staff Sgt. Sykes: He said field fun.

Anthony: [seeing the flames of the burning oil fields] The Earth is bleeding.

Bored: [to Anthony Swofford] I'm gonna put you in Golf Company... it's full of retards and fuck-ups. Maybe you can elevate them sons of bitches a little... or maybe not. Next!

[Staff sgt. Sykes sends out his "best snipers", Swofford and Troy]
Anthony: Thank you, staff sergeant.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: What?
Anthony: Thank you.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: Don't thank me, just don't fuckin' die.

Fowler: [in showers, pointing at another marine] Hey, look! It's a cock, but smaller!

Anthony: [voice over narration] See that kid? The one dreaming to serve his country. That Jarhead is me.

Anthony: Sir, the Drill Instructor looks fabulous in his uniform, sir!

Kruger: [to the Marines] It's raining oil. It's raining oil fellas. You ever see that movie 'Giant'? You've seen the movie 'Giant'. James Dean, man. "My well came in, Bick. I'm rich, Bick. Richer than you."

Troy: Fuck politics. We're here. All the rest is bullshit.
All: Yeah.

Anthony: We call this friendly fire, friendly fucking, or getting friendly fucked.

Anthony: [voice over narration] Every war is different, every war is the same.

Fowler: [referring to his weapon] You guys should see what the 40 does to the head of a fucking camel!
Troy: What does the 40 do to the head of a camel, Fowler?
Fowler: It turns the head inside out in about three fucking knots.

Anthony: You poor bastard. I bet your recruiter promised you a whole wide world of pussy, huh?
Kruger: Fuckin' eh. Cocksucker knew the price of every whore from Olangapo to Stockholm.
Anthony: And here we are, headed to the desert - no pussy in a thousand miles.
Kruger: Fucked by the green weenie again!
Anthony: Well, what would you be doing if you were a civilian? Staying up late, jacking off, playing Metroid - trying to get to that ninth level?
Troy: You know what happens when you get there?
[laughs]
Troy: Nothing. You just start all over again.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [Sgt. Sykes is directing the recruits on how to judge distances] You take what you know, and then you multiply. Please don't use your dicks. They're too small, and I can't count that high. I don't wanna hear, "400,000 inches."

Kruger: [after being offered nuts on an airplane] Are these warm nuts?
Stewardess: No, I believe they're room temperature.
Kruger: [takes the nuts] Well, maybe later you can come and warm up my nuts.
Stewardess: You know, I don't really like the little ones.

[first lines]
Anthony: A story: A man fires a rifle for many years, and he goes to war. And afterward he turns the rifle in at the armory, and he believes he's finished with the rifle. But no matter what else he might do with his hands, love a woman, build a house, change his son's diaper; his hands remember the rifle.

Cortez: I'm the midget, huh? Let's go you squishy-faced retard!
Fowler: [dead serious] Don't you ever call me squishy-face!

D.I. Fitch: Jesus, Joseph and doggy-style Mary!

Cortez: This is what life is about, boys!
Fowler: She's a big bitch, Cortez!
Cortez: She's not big, she's beautiful, and she's beautiful because she's pregnant! That's what life is about.

Troy: I love it out here, this is what I want - 'cause I count for something. Back home, I'd be working some nowhere job, nobody'd even know I was alive. 'We burn the fat off our souls,'... Hemingway said that.

Reporter: Are you scared?
Anthony: Look, I'm twenty years old and I was dumb enough to sign a contract. I can hear their fucking bombs already. I can hear their bombs and I'm fucking scared, yeah.

Anthony: [voice over narration] For most problems the Marine is issued a solution. If ill, go to sickbay. If wounded, call a Corpsman. If dead, report to graves registration. If losing his mind, however, no standard solution exists.

Anthony: What's up, buddy? Merry Christmas.
Corporal: Yeah.
Anthony: I hear you got some good shit.
Corporal: Fly, rumor, on winged feet. Here... read this.
Anthony: What is it?
Corporal: It's a love letter for the Major. I write all of his letters.
Anthony: "Dear sweet Gloria, I wish I was up in you now with a finger in your ass. Love you, Captain Skinboat."
Corporal: I studied classics at Dartmouth.
Anthony: It's a good school.
Corporal: Forty bucks, five gallons.

D.I. Fitch: Are you eyeballing me with those baby-blues? Are you?
Anthony: Sir, no, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Are you in love with me, Swofford?
Anthony: Sir, no, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Oh, you don't think I look good in my uniform, Swofford?
Anthony: Sir, the Drill Instructor looks fabulous in his uniform, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Oh, so you're gay then and you love me! Huh?
Anthony: Sir, I'm not gay, sir!
D.I. Fitch: You got a girlfriend, Swafford?
Anthony: Sir, yes, sir!
D.I. Fitch: Guess again motherfucker, Jody's banging her right now! Get on your face and give me twenty five for all the times she's gonna get fucked this month! Down on your face!

Troy: We're the leopards... the lions. Those who will take our place will be jackals... hyenas - and all us leopards, lions, jackals, and sheep will go on thinking ourselves the salt of the earth.

Anthony: [the Doors' "Break on Through" being played on a flying by helicopter] That's Vietnam music... can't we get our own music?

Anthony: The M16A2 service rifle is a lightweight air-cooled, gas-operated, magazine-fed shoulder weapon. It fires a 5.56 mm ball projectile at a muzzle velocity of 2,800 feet per second. This is my rifle. Repeat after me.

Anthony: [voice over narration] A flashlight was a moonbeam. A pen was an ink stick. My mouth was a cum receptacle. A bed was a rack. A wall was a bulkhead. A shirt was a blouse. A tie was still a tie, and a belt a belt. But many other things would never be the same.

Kruger: This is censorship.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: This is what?
Kruger: Censorship. You're telling us what we can and can't say to the press. That's un-American.
Anthony: Yeah, what about freedom of speech? The Constitution?
Staff Sgt. Sykes: No you signed a contract. You don't have any rights. You got any complaints you complain to Saddam Insane and see if he gives a fuck.
Kruger: Why that's exactly what Saddam Hussein does. You're treating us the same way.
Staff Sgt. Sykes: You are a Marine. There is no such thing as speech that is free. You must pay for everything that you say.

[last lines]
Anthony: A story. A man fires a rifle for many years. and he goes to war. And afterwards he comes home, and he sees that whatever else he may do with his life - build a house, love a woman, change his son's diaper - he will always remain a jarhead. And all the jarheads killing and dying, they will always be me. We are still in the desert.

Staff Sgt. Sykes: [Yelling at a private, who is struggling to get into his protective gear during a gas drill] That's your fuckin' sleeping bag, you moron!

Anthony: [Swoff and Fergus are disassembling and reassembling their rifles in their tent. Cortez is sitting a few bunks down, messing with his radio] What would you say if I told you I was gonna kill you for fucking me over like that?
Fergus: I already told you, it was an accident.
Anthony: An accident. Right. Like when the trigger slips. Of course, your nice little mom and dad are where?
Fergus: Cottonwood Falls.
Anthony: Cottonwood Falls. They'll be sad. They won't have their little boy to send fucking cookies to. I'll say it was an accidental discharge. I might spend some time in the brig... but it'll end this fucking waiting. And I don't know what it's like to kill a man.
[loads rifle and points it at Fergus]
Fergus: What are you doing?
Anthony: I'm in the firing position known as the sitting position. After the prone position, it is the platform most likely to enable a Marine to effectively kill his target. His target being a human, generally an enemy but sometimes a friend or friendly. We call this friendly fire, or friendly fucking or getting friendly fucked.
Fergus: Come on Swoff, it was your watch! It was Christmas Eve, and I was just thinking about home. That's it.
Anthony: What do you think Cortez? You think I'll accidentally kill your homeboy from boot camp?
Cortez: Sure you'll kill him. Accidents happen.
Anthony: You don't see shit right?
Cortez: I don't see shit. This ain't even my tent. Matter of fact, I ain't even here, Swoff.
[exits tent]