The Best The Office, Season 8, Episode 9 Quotes

Kelly: I have these sneakers, which are basically just like a gyn for your feet, so...

Darryl: [working out at Dwight's new gym] Dude, I'm gonna be here all week, right? Five days a week. I figure I'll start slow.
Dwight: Is that the same philosophy you apply to buffalo wings? I want you to bring that same buffalo wing passion to this gym! I'm gonna make you look like LeBron James!
Darryl: It's LeJon Brames.
Dwight: That's what I said.

Toby: Did you bring your passport with you?
Mrs. California: Who walks around with their passport?
Toby: Well, I do. Always ready for adventure.
Mrs. California: Have you had any?
Toby: No.

Phyllis: We have a gym at home. It's called the bedroom.

Darryl: Dude, I'm gonna be here all week, right? Five days a week. I figure I'll start slow.
Dwight: Is that the same philosophy you apply to Buffalo wings?

- but it's just what I'm thinking.
- All right. Thanks.
- Yes. All right.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.

Darryl: I used to say I wanted to live long enough to see a black president. I never realized how easy that would be. So now I want to live long enough to see a really really gay president or a supermodel president.

Dwight: Standing is proven to be healthier, increases productivity, and just looks cooler. Picture someone doing something heroic. Now was he sitting or standing? Not counting FDR.

Mrs. California: All right, well, it's really nice to meet you, Bryan.
Ryan: Uh, it's actually Ryan.
Mrs. California: Oh, Ryan.
Ryan: [in the "confessional"] Bitch...

Darryl: No, this isn't a gym. This is like a scene out of Saw V.

- Time to settle this.
- Wait, wait, wait.
- Hold on, hold on.
- I just need to get through.
- Just real quick.
- Real quick, open... okay.
- That's weird.
- Well, he's gotta be around here somewhere.

Jim: No, I don't think we should be trying to make this place seem unpleasant. I think we should let this place jsut crush her spirit by itself. I mean, it knows what it's doing.

- Because you're sitting?
- Standing.
- Okay. Don't!
- Because you're sitting?
- Standing.
- You know I have to do this.
- I know.
- Whoa!

- Hey hey, man.
- Taking a load off, huh?
- No. Putting a load on, more like.
- Good luck with that.
- Last thing I need is luck.
- Thank you so much.

- Are you really comfortable standing there?
- I tried one of those, and I just couldn't find the sweet spot.
- Hey, guys, let's just all admit it, okay? Dwight's better than us.
- He had the guts to stop sitting, and he's never, ever gonna go back on it, right?
- That's right, Jim.