The Best Kyle Gass Quotes

Artie: It never occurred to you that picking girls solely on their looks may not be the best way to go about it?
Hal: What, am I supposed to apologize for having high standards?
Jen: High standards? In the five years I've known you, every woman, I should say girl, you've gone after has been completely out of your league.
Hal: What's that supposed to mean?
Artie: Oh, she doesn't mean anything by it. She's just saying you're not that good looking.
Hal: Oh! I thought she was implying something really mean.

Jen: Hal, we all know you're as deep as a puddle but this just flat out sucks.
Artie: If you had one ounce of integrity left, you would break it off immediately... before you hurt the poor girl.