The Best Steve Newlin Quotes

Steve: At first we just focused on the guns, but then we thought, well, hey, what's a wooden arrow?
Jason: Well, it's an itty-bitty stake.

Steve: And what's going on out there is a war.
[Jason looks out the window]
Steve: Not right now, Jason, but in general. And we all gotta choose sides. Now, you're either on the side of darkness, or the side of light.

Sookie: [to the armed congregation] Let us leave! Save yourselves! No one has to die!
Steve: The war has begun, you evil whore of Satan. You vampires cast the first stone by killin' my family! The lines have been drawn. You're either with us or against us. We are prepared for armageddon.
Sookie: The vampire you were holding got away. He's a sheriff. He's bound to send for help.
Steve: I'm not concerned with Godric. Any vampire will do for our grand celebration and we've got one right here.
[Eric]
Eric: [to Sookie] I'll be fine.
Steve: [gleefully] Brothers and sisters, there will be a holy bonfire at dawn.

Rev. Steve Newlin: We are forming an elite spiritual army.

Steve: [angry] You know, what burns me the most is that I brought you into my home. I treated you like family!
Jason: I know and I'm so sorry... I'm weak.
Steve: Yes, you are! I gave you a chance and salvation and you chose *them*!
Jason: I know it was wrong. I...
[Realizes what Steve said]
Jason: Wait. Who are "them"?
Steve: Oh, please, cut the act. I know who you are and who you're workin' for.
Jason: [Confused] The road crew?
Steve: That's funny. Oh, boy, I didn't think that you were the sharpest tool in the shed. Good at takin' orders, but not too bright. But boy, was I wrong. You are snakier than a snake in the grass.

Rev. Steve Newlin: You know nothing. On the final day of reckoning we'll see who goes to heaven and who goes to hell.
Jason: I reckon I've already been to heaven, and it was inside your wife.

Eric: [chained in silver] I... I offer myself in exchange for Godric's freedom and the girl's as well.
Steve: That's noble, but she's just as culpable as you are. She's a traitor to her race. The human race. She hardly deserves mercy. Maybe we should tie her to you so you could meet the sun together.
Bill: [charging in] Sookie!
Steve: [holding a gun to Sookie's head] One more step, vampire and the girl dies.
Bill: If you shoot her, everyone here will die. Let her go, now!
Steve: [to Sookie] Honestly, what do they see in you?

Rev. Steve Newlin: You see? Justice as our Lord our Savior was betrayed for 30 pieces of silver, a few ounces of silver can betray a child of Satan to the world!
Sookie: That doesn't make any sense!
[to the crowd]
Sookie: How can you people listen to him?

Stan: Steve Newlin! You have pushed us too far. You expect us to sit on our thumbs while you round up your men to come lynch us? We'll kill you first. Same way we did your father.
Sookie: Oh god, no.
Steve: Murderer!
Stan: [to the other vamps] Destroy all of them.
Godric: [as the vamps swarm the church] Enough! You came for me, I assume. Underlings?
Stan: Yes, sheriff.
Godric: These people have not harmed me. You see we can coexist. Mr. Newlin, I do not wish to create blood shed when none is called for. Help me set an example. If we leave you in peace, will you do the same?
Steve: [seething] I will not negotiate with subhumans! Kill me. Do it. Jesus will protect me.
Godric: I am actually older than your Jesus. I wish I could have known him, but I missed it.
[to the armed congregation]
Godric: Good people, who of you is willing to die for this man's madness?
[met with silence]
Godric: That's what I thought. Stand down, everyone. People, go home. It's over now.
Sookie: Oh, thank god. Bill?
Bill: It's alright. You're safe now.

Steve: [to Hugo & Sookie] Mornin'! Refreshments? How did ya'll sleep?
Sookie: [about vampires] They're comin' for us, you know.
Steve: Yeah, well that's what I thought. Figured a pretty girl like you had a vamp runnin' off to her rescue. Actually we're kinda hopin' for it, weren't we, Gabe?
Gabe: Yes, sir. Bring it on.
Steve: We're waiting for him. We've been waiting a long time.
Sookie: You're gonna get yourself killed. That't not a threat. That's a fact.
Steve: They've got you all twisted up, haven't that? With their glamoring and their empty promises and their evil blood.
Sookie: [disgusted] You're the ones who are twisted! You call yourself Christians? Jesus would be ashamed of you!
Steve: [laughing] I guess we're gonna have to agree to disagree on that one. Now things got a little outta hand last night and I apologize for that. I'm not the monster that the vampire lovin' media makes me out to be.
Sookie: Yeah right!
Steve: All I want from you is a couple of answers and than I'll be happy to feed you a nice hot breakfast and send you on your way.
Hugo: What do you want to know?
Sookie: Shut up!
Hugo: Sookie, we need to get out of here. Just tell them what they want to know.
[to Steve]
Hugo: He name is Sookie Stackhouse and I'm Hugo Aries.
Sookie: Hugo, no!
Hugo: We were sent here by the vampires of Area 9 to find their sheriff!

Steve: [over the TV] It's a beautiful sunny morning in America, Ms. Flanagan. I wish you were here.
Nan: [tartly] Give me twelve hours, Reverand Newlin. I'll be right there.

Rev. Steve Newlin: [to Sookie] The war has begun, you evil whore of Satan.

Steve: You know Sarah doesn't whip out her pudding for just anybody.