The Best How I Met Your Mother, Season 8, Episode 21 Quotes

Lily: [about how Marshall told half-truths about his work life] When you said you were about to get reamed?
Marshall: Oh right that. No, sometimes for fun, we throw reams of paper at each other. Bernard! Not a good time! Read the room!

- And before you know it...
- ...his life turns into an angsty, existential black-and-white
- Italian movie.
- Exactly.

Ted: Okay, can I just say something as your best man? Be careful.
Barney: What do you mean?
Ted: You just... you haven't been acting like a guy who's about to get married, and I know you think it's okay because Robin's so cool, but I'm telling you, she's not as cool as you think she is.
Barney: Oh, I see. And you'd know this because you know Robin better than I do. You know what she appreciates better than her own fiancé?
Ted: Look, I'm just saying, if I was getting married in three weeks...
Barney: But you're not getting married in three weeks, Ted. I am. Robin's marrying me, not you.
Ted: [Pregnant pause] You're right. Not my place.

- I love you, too.
- All right.
- We're going to Italy.
- Si!
- You may not know this yet, but, um,
- I've already done some shopping.

- We have no friends there.
- We don't speak the language.
- Okay, so you know that one sentence.
- Can you say anything else?
- That-that was the same sentence.
- You just changed the inflection.

Marshall: [Marshall tries to convince Lily of accepting the Captain's assignment for her in Rome and she calls him on her speaking only one Italian sentence. subtitles appear while Marshall repeats said sentence] Come on, maybe the only sentence I know is "come on bro, don't Bogart all the Funyuns," but I know in my heart that you understand me anyway. Because no one I know has better understood anyone better than you and I understand each other. Is this trip going to be scary? Yes. Do I like the idea of not knowing the language? Of course not, but I believe we can do this. I love you, Lily. I love you.
Lily: I love you.
[kisses Marshall]
Lily: So, we're going to Italy!
Marshall: Si!

- Lily, you're fired.
- What? But no!
- It's still a great painting.
- And I like what it says about structure and society and the changing roles of women.
- Cheech, la porta!

- I used to be a lawyer.
- I don't know anymore.

- and there's never a line!
- I understand it's a big decision.
- Take all the time you need.
- Just let me know by the end of the day.
- Also, I need your advice on purchasing some luggage.
- What kind?
- Carry on.

- Lily, you're not gonna screw up.
- You know what, just please, just leave it alone.
- Besides, deep down, I don't think
- Marshall's even excited about Italy.

- Lily, why the hell did you turn that down again?
- Because I'd have to get a new passport photo, and I'd miss out on New York in August, and plus they opened a Shake Shack on our block so...
- Lily, what's the real reason?
- What if we move to Rome...

- All right,
- I'm gonna call him.
- Hey, baby.
- Hey, baby, I can't talk right now.
- I'm working on a big case. Bye.
Narrator: And that's when Lily realized what moving to Rome would really mean.