The Best Lucifer, Season 1, Episode 4 Quotes

Lucifer: Why do humans think they can rectify one evil with another?

- most of your moves at events like these.
- I've never been to something like this before in my life.
- I certainly don't need any help getting women into bed.
- Till...
- Were you hit on the head when you were small?
- No?

- Don't kill me!
- Lucifer.
- Don't move.
Lucifer: Detective, you should leave.
- Who are you?
- What are you?

- Nay, I'm the best at punishing bad people.
- Yeah, well, I think you don't just enjoy punishing the bad guys.
- I think you're starting to like seeking justice for the good ones.
- J'j'

Lucifer: You're quite adorable when you're flustered.
Chloe: I... I'm not flustered. I'm nauseous.
Lucifer: Now you're blushing; I'd say I'm making headway.
Chloe: Okay, look, let me make myself perfectly clear. I will never, ever, ever sleep with you. Never. Okay? Got it?
Lucifer: Playing hard to get, I like it.
Chloe: When Hell freezes over, Lucifer...
Lucifer: I can arrange that, actually.

[gunshot] ♪ I'd sink deeper ♪
- He's the devil!
- He's the devil!

Carver: [shouts] You. Are. A Player! Own it!
[crowd cheers]
Lucifer: [sitting up] Excuse... excuse me! Excuse me, question!
Chloe: [low] What are you doing?
Carver: The Q&A's after the speech, buddy.
Lucifer: No, but it's quite pressing. What if you have all those manly whatnots and the woman still doesn't respond?
Carver: You may think you have them, but you don't.
[Chloe nods]
Carver: That's why you're here, right?

- I'm an angel.
- You can't beat me, little demon.
- Stop and hear me out.
- Men...
- They always want to talk.
- J'j'

- Don't worry, detective.
- I'm immortal, remember?
- I knew it. [Line ringing]
- Hey, guys, I'm gonna need you sooner than I thought.
- Is SWAT ready?
- J'j'

- No, I can't let you do that.
- I'm not gonna call this in, but you have to stay here.
- No discussion.
- I'm coming with you.
- Fine.
- You'll have to wait in the car.
- J'j'

- okay? Got it?
- Playing hard to get, I like it.
- When hell freezes over, Lucifer.
- I can arrange that, actually.
- Get in the car.
- J'j'

- Well, since you shot Lucifer, it must mean you really like him.
- Hmm.
- You know, it is bedtime, you little weasel.
- You weasel. I'm gonna get you.
- Story time! Story time!

- Well done, detective.
Chloe: No, he didn't follow us.
- He must have gotten the address somehow.
- Or someone told him.
- Either way, he's gonna get someone killed, probably himself.
- This love thing makes you all quite stupid, doesn't it?

- Well, that place is notoriously overpriced to rent.
- If carver wants cash, he shouldn't have it there.
- No, he shouldn't.
- I think I just figured out how you can fix this.
- Oh?
- Do tell.

- Now, we can help each other.
- We can get him back to where he belongs, if you could just provide me with a weak spot.
- Some insight.
- No...
- Means no.

Linda: [to Lucifer] People don't have power over us. We give it to them. You have to take your power back.

- What does this mean?
- Well, it means I shot you.
- And I'm an idiot, and I'm sorry.
- And I'm in so much trouble.
- Ah! It really hurts!
- What's happening to me?

- Uh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. No! No!
- Hmm?
- Lucifer, this is George.
- George, Lucifer.
- Lucifer, George.
- Oops.