The Best Friends, Season 10, Episode 5 Quotes

Rachel: So, how's the baby styling business going?
Amy: Not that great. It's almost as if people don't want to hear that their babies are ugly.

- But Erin brockovich had her own house.
- Ah, look who's back.
- Why do you have bags?
- Rach, why does she have bags?
- I'm staying with you guys.
- What?
- We're gonna be roomies!
- Come on.

Amy: [offended] Hey, you know what? This kid needs me, okay? She needs to have a cool fun aunt.
Monica: [argumentatively] I'm a cool fun aunt!
Amy: [rolling her eyes] Okay...
Chandler: Hey! Monica can be cool and fun at organized indoor events.

Amy: Uh, sure you wanna eat that?
Joey: [Annoyed] I'm curvy and I like it!

- So no matter where we go,
- I'm wearing something fancy...
- And I'm gonna put on my finest jewelry...
- And we're gonna have sex in a public restroom.
- You guys do that?
- Chandler won't even have sex in our bathroom.
- That's where people make number two.

Joey: [about Amy] She's the hottest girl I've ever hated.

- Phoebe, I love you.
- There's no one else in the world I would ask to marry me three times.
- But I want to take care of you...
- Have babies with you...
- And grow old with you.
- Phoebe buffay, will you marry me?

Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation.
[He hands it over to Chandler]
Joey: Here. And I think you'll be very, very happy. It's the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
Chandler: [reading] I don't... uh... understand.
Joey: Some of the words are a little too sophisticated for ya?
Monica: It doesn't make any sense.
Joey: Of course it does! It's smart! I used the the-saurus!
Chandler: On *every* word?
Joey: Yep!
Monica: Alright, what was this sentence originally?
Joey: Oh, 'They are warm, nice, people with big hearts'.
Chandler: And that became 'they are humid prepossessing Homo Sapiens with full sized aortic pumps?
Joey: Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
Monica: Hey Joey, I don't think we can use this.
Joey: Why not?
Monica: Well, because you signed it baby kangaroo Tribbiani.
[Joey makes an 'and-what's-wrong-with-that' look]
Monica: Hey, why don't you stop worrying about sounding smart and just be yourself!
Chandler: You know what? You don't need a thesaurus, just write from here,
[points at his own heart]
Chandler: your full sized aortic pump.

- Like war. Or that thing in Joey's refrigerator. Remember?
- It was in a milk carton, but it looked like meat?
- Come here. Come here.
- There she is. Hi.
- What?
- Nothing.
- What...?

Amy: I got you a present for letting me stay with you. Ready? Ta-dah!
[Takes off Emma's hat and reveals her ears are pierced]
Rachel: You pierced her ears?
Amy: Doesn't it make her nose look smaller?

- I love you.
- I love you more.
- Not possible.

- Well, it should be.
- I'm gonna help babies learn how to accessorize...
- What colors to wear, what clothes are slimming.
- Babies don't care if they're slim!
- Enter Amy.
- Amy, I... I just... I just wanna...
- What? What are you gonna do?
- No more falafel for you!

Phoebe: Ugh. I just had the worst anniversary dinner ever!
Chandler: Really? Tell her about us, last year.
Monica: I bought Chandler a five hundred dollar watch and he wrote me a Rap song.
Ross: Really?
Chandler: Word.