The Best How I Met Your Mother, Season 2, Episode 20 Quotes

Barney: You guys know how it's hard to be friends with me because I'm so awesome?
Ted: Uh, yes, it's hard to be friends with you. Go on.

Marshall: Hey, Lil.
Lily: Hey.
Ted: "Hey"? That's it?
Marshall: What are you talking about?
Ted: Well, you guys have been spending the last few nights apart. I thought there'd be a lot of giggling and crying, jumping up and down... and then whatever Lily would do.

Lily: I lost a pound!
Robin: That is impossible! You ate McDonalds every day for three days.
Lily: I knew that Super Size Me guy was full of it!

Robin: Barney, I didn't know you were such a fan of The Price is Right!
Barney: Are you kidding? TPIR is not just an indescribably entertaining hour of television, it's a microcosm of our entire economic system - a capitalist utopia, where consumers are rewarded for their persistence, market acumen, and intrepid spirit. I gaze upon the glory of The Price is Right, and I see the face of America, and it is divine. Plus, you know, hot girls on sports cars.

Robin: Why in the world do you think Bob Barker is your father?
Barney: Uh, because my mother told me he was, that's why.
Young: [flashback] Mom, who's my dad? All the other kids at school know who their dad is. Who's mine?
Barney's: Oh, I don't know.
Barney's: [points at The Price is Right on TV] That guy.

- It would make our wedding night more special.
- Okay, let's do it.
- Done.
- I'm gonna go grab a beer.
- I'll come with you.
- No. I'll stay.

Barney: So you and Lily really think you can spend two weeks apart?
Marshall: Y'know Barney, Lily and I are a lot less cheesy than you make us out to be.
Lily: Hey Marshmallow, don't forget to pack my night-night tape.
Barney: Night-night tape? Did you make a tape of you saying "night-night" to her?
Lily: He doesn't say it. He sings it.
Barney: Oh, that is so sweet! Why don't you kiss, I love it when two chicks make out.