The Best The Office, Season 6, Episode 9 Quotes

Creed: Something's up. That paper was never supposed to arrive.

Toby: Pam, can I talk to you for a second?
Pam: Oh.
Toby: Um, I heard about the hit. Just be sure that it's off company property, right?
Pam: Right.
Toby: Yeah okay. I think we should be okay.
Pam: Okay.
Toby: Okay. And... the - the - the power comes from the back foot.
[demonstrates how to throw a punch]
Toby: So it's - it's all one motion thorough the body. So there's- you stay a little low. And there's a twist. You keep your shoulder down. You kind of throw out the arm. Pow!

Pam: Michael's been trying to get Jim and me to hang out ever since he started dating my mom. I don't know. I really hoped this thing would just die out, but today he's planning a birthday lunch for my mom and we have to go. No way out. No way out.

Andy: You give me a gift, bam, thank-you note. You invite me somewhere, pow, RSVP. You do me a favor, wham, favor returned. Do not test my politeness.

[telling the office how Michael gave her her birthday necklace]
Helene: He put it around my neck while I was still asleep this morning. Nice way to wake up.
Michael: Yeah. The rest of the story has been censored due to inappropriocity.
Kevin: Because of sex?
Pam: Kevin!
Michael: Hey, please, Kevin. You're fired.

Michael: As I watched Pam's big, strong hand coming towards my face, I saw my entire life flash before my eyes. And guess what? I have four kids. And I have a hover car and a hover house. And my wife is a runner, and it shows. And Pam and Jim are my best friends, and our kids play together. And I'm happy. And I am rich and I never die. It doesn't sound like much, but it's enough for me.

Pam: Why did I get in the car? I could have struggled. I have a whistle in my purse and I didn't even blow it.

Michael: Who is kafkaesque? I've never- I don't know him.

Dwight: [to camera crew] Can't a guy just buy some bagels for his friends, so they'll owe him a favor which he can use to get someone fired who stole a co-manager position from him anymore? Jeez, when did everyone get so cynical?

Dwight: What's going on in here?
Oscar: Andy bought lunch.
Dwight: Oh, no, really?
Andy: Yep, yep. Took a page right out of the old Schrute book of niceness.
Dwight: There is no book; there's only a survival guide.

- Okay.
- You owe me.
- Can't a guy just buy some bagels for his friends, so they'll owe him a favor which he can use to get someone fired who stole a co-manager position from him anymore?
- Jeez, when did everyone get so cynical?

- Okay, so...
- And I want kids.
- And you, unfortunately, have already completed that part of your journey down there. Michael.
- It's not my decision, it's mother nature.
- And mother has very strict rules about