50 Best Get Him to the Greek Quotes

Aldous: Let's get out of this bourgeois shit hole.

Aldous: [Lars Ulrich enters scene] Oh, Enter Sandman.

Aldous: Aaron, look at what you're wearing. Do you think that now you live in Seattle, you're grunge or something? You look like a lesbian.
Aaron: Play the song, man.

Aldous: We're gonna fuck these two girls.
Aaron: I just got out of a relationship.
Aldous: Was your ex a blonde or brunette?
Aaron: Brunette.
Aldous: Blonde it is.

Aaron: [at a club] What's up man?
Tom: Hey.
Aaron: I'm here with Aldous Snow, so we have a table in the back.
Tom: [not interested] Great.
Aaron: Feel free to bring Professor Snape. Come by, we'll play some late night Quidditch.
Tom: Just leave it, you...
[walks away]
Aaron: Right. Not everyone cares.

Sergio: This is what old pussy used to look like in the 70's.

Jonathan: That's the best part about the Jeffrey. It goes away and then it comes back.

Aaron: I feel like I'm in "2 Fast 2 Furious."

Destiny: Wanna sing hairy-oke?

Daphne: I can't wait to sit around for 4 days and watch "Gossip Girl."

Aldous: What you did was very spiteful, but it was also very brave and very honest and I respect you for doing that. But the content of what you said has made me hate you. So there's a layer of respect, admittedly, for your truthfulness, but it's peppered with hate. Hateful respect.

Aaron: Do you know the lyrics to "African Child"?
Smiling: I don't know the lyrics. I just bang the drum and do the African face.
[He shows Aaron his version of playing the African drum]

Jackie: [sung] One, two, three, four, it's just like comin' in the back door. Five, six, seven, eight, uhh, feels great. A ring, a ring, a ring around my rosy. My little pocket is so fit and so damn cozy. Ring, a ring, a ring around my rosy. All the boys in town say I've the prettiest of posies. A ring around my rosy, my pocket's so damn cozy, and my posy, my posy. I'm talking about my asshole.

Aldous: This is it, Aaron. This is rock n' roll. Did you enjoy the party?

Aldous: [as he is watching TV] Didn't I have sex with her once?
[Aldous sees Sarah Marshall on TV]
Aldous: Yeah, I did.

Aldous: Your brain is full of lollipops, rainbows, and cheese.

Aaron: [has just been injected with adrenaline] I'm alive!

Aaron: [Aaron has a balloon full of heroin up his ass] Oh, no.
Aldous: What?
Aaron: I have to sneeze... and I'm afraid that if I do... my bowels will evacuate...

Sergio: [intense] Time to get our mind-fuck on.

Sergio: You can't outrun me! I'm black!

Sergio: Where are you? Why haven't you called? I'm calling you right now and I just got hit by a motherfucking car.

[sending Aaron a text]
Sergio: Aaron! Where the fuck are you? I'm gonna kill you! Smiley face.

Aaron: Are you Paul Krugman?
Paul: Uh, yeah.
Aaron: My dad loves your shit.
Paul: Uh, thank you.

Sergio: Stop smiling like that. You look like an 8 year old who just discovered his first boner.
Aaron: ...Well I don't have one so...

Sergio: Where the fuck have you guys been?
Sergio's: We went and saw Cher.
Sergio: Cher? How was she?
Sergio's: [Dazzled] Amaaaazing!

Aldous: [urging Aaron to put drugs up his rectum] Come on, mate, we ain't got all day. It's not recreational, it's not meant to be a hobby, just get it up there. Close the door behind ya.

Aldous: I labored under the myth of monogamy for sever years with Jackie and it was pointless.
Aaron: So you only slept with Jackie?
Aldous: No, I slept with other people but I always told her about it. Monogamy.

Aaron: Nothing you say makes any sense, I understand that now, you're just a fucking junkie and you're smart so you make your insanity sound, good but its bullshit.

Aldous: When the world slips you a Jeffrey, stroke the furry wall.

Daphne: I want to have a threesome.

Jackie: The old Aldous, would've you know, had his way with you he would have bent you over that pretty little chair and had his way and now we'd be having a three way you'd be coming over for a cognac later I'll tell you that sweetie. You bet that's not happening anymore.
Aldous: Do you want me to start drinking again? Is that what you'd like? You want me to return to that?
Jackie: Maybe you should. Maybe you should.
Aldous: I'll do lines off her forehead while I'm in her up to my nuts. Is that what you want?
Jackie: I'm just saying.

Sergio: I've got six fuckin' kids! Do you know how many Air Jordans six black kids wear?

Aldous: How's the weather down there?
Jackie: Wet.

Limousine: Would you like me to take the Chiswick roundabout through Hounslow and Staines?
Aaron: What is this, fucking Middle Earth? Just take us to the airport, okay.

Aaron: I think I just got raped.
Aldous: [handing him a joint] Only one thing to do.
Aaron: [taking a hit] Uh, guys? What is this stuff? My heart's going really fast.
Aldous: Oh, it's a bit of this, a bit of that. It's called a Jeffrey. It's mostly weed, with a bit of opium as well... ground-up E's... heroin... Clorox...
Aaron: I think I'm having a heart attack.

Sergio: [in Aaron's hallucination] You lost control motherfucker! Wee! Wee! Look, I'm eating my own head!

Matty: Man, that opening party was incredible. Check out the pictures on Myspace. There's one of me eating cheese off some girl's titties.
Aaron: Please just lie to me and say I didn't miss another awesome party.
Matty: You missed an awesome party. I woke up with glitter on my dick.

Pharrell: How do I look?
Sergio: Man, lose the pink. It's not gangster.
Pharrell: That's your problem. Everything is gangster with you.
Sergio: The name of the song is "I'm Gangsta!"

Aaron: Across the mystic desert, is a desert that is mystic.

Aldous: Doesn't it make sense that we should stay here and possibly have the time of your life?

Sergio: Shut up. Don't speak.

Sergio: You've been mind-fucked before?
Aaron: I don't think so.
Sergio: I'm mind-fucking you right now.
Aaron: You are?
Sergio: Can't you feel my dick fucking your mind?
Aaron: No, I can't really feel anything.
Sergio: See? That's it. That's the art of it. I'm mind-fucking the shit out of you.
Aaron: Well I hope you're wearing a condom cause I have a dirty mind.

Aldous: Now I'm just worried about drugs. Your life's to-do list must be a baffling document. You're worried about so many things Aaron. You're worried about will we get to the show, will I perform well, will you get the credit you deserve. Mine has on it but one word. Do you know what that word is?

Aaron: [as Sergio is chasing after them in a hotel lobby] This is the longest hallway of all time!
Aldous: It's Kubrickian!

Jonathan: I'm responsible for your talent, son. I wrote all your songs off the tip of my cock.
Aldous: Yeah, I just don't get how talent can be contained in one's spunk.

Aldous: This is not an appropriate time to say "namaste".

Aldous: I was watching the news one day and I saw footage about, uh, war, and I think it was Darfur, or Zimbabwe, or Rwanda, or one of 'em, and I thought, 'this isn't right, is it?' And I made some phone calls and it turns out, it isn't.

Pharrell: You're five zippers away from "Thriller".
Sergio: Oh, and you're one shirt away from Carlton, muthafucka.

Sergio: [in a text] Where the fuck are you? I am gonna kill you. Smiley face.

[Aldous is talking to Jackie]
Lars: Babe, we should get back to Naples. He's waiting back there for us.
Aldous: Why don't you go sue Napster, you little Danish twat!