The Best Lucifer, Season 3, Episode 18 Quotes

Marcus: I had a gut feeling about this case. I wanted to see if I was right.
Lucifer: As much as we appreciate your digestive feelings...

Lucifer: [When the killer has incapacitated Pierce and Decker] Too bad. If you'd started with him, I would've let you swing.

Lucifer: For the record, Detective, I'd like you to note that I haven't once asked you about your evening with Pierce. I realize it's none of my business.
Chloe: You're right. It's not.
Lucifer: But Miss Lopez thinks you boned.
Chloe: WHAT?
Lucifer: Her words, not mine.

- and I want to do that if you'll give me the chance.
[Stammers] That's...
- Chloe?
- You all right?
- Chloe!
- Chloe.

Emma: I'm not proud of what happened. But I was upset. I just found out Robbie was cheating on me.
Lucifer: Well, completely understandable. I mean, what else are you supposed to do when some parasite inserts himself into your relationship?
[Glares at Pierce]

Amenadiel: What would I like? Well... sometimes the answer to that is not so simple, is it? I mean, I would like to know what my father's next test is. I feel pretty confident that I passed the last one, but... what's next? And what am I supposed to do in between? Or is that, in itself, a test?
Barista: [Weirded out] Okay... How about a large mocha with extra whip?

Lucifer: Ah. I know that look. Either there are new sandwiches in the vending machine, or you have a lead.

Chloe: Lieutenant, we need you on this case.
Lucifer: [sighs] And I normally love threesomes.

- The safari inn.
[Sighs] This isn't just a lovers' quarrel.
- No, you're right.
- The copycat's just getting started.
- Lieutenant, we need you on this case.
- And I normally love threesomes.

- You're terrified of letting someone get close to you
- 'cause you know they'll eventually leave you.
- You'll outlive them.
- You got to have faith, because life can surprise you.
- Now, if my brother, the devil, can have that...
- Maybe I can, too.

- And I... I was disappointed, but, you know, I got it.
- And you're the one who said you're, you know,
- "not relationship material."
- You're a good man and I really like you, but I, uh, I-I need somebody who can let me in and I just don't know if that's... you.

- Or is that, in itself, a test?
- Okay.
- How about a large mocha with extra whip?
- Sure. Sure.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Large americano for Charlotte.

Joel: We wanted to show the world that you-you can't just leave people.
Lucifer: [Grabs him by the neck] You don't get to decide who someone wants to be with.
[Lets go]
Lucifer: And neither do I.
Joel: Does this mean you're-you're not, you're not gonna...
[Lucifer punches him in the face]

- Without the addresses censored out?
- Well, yeah, I mean, that's what unedited means.
- I'm showing life at its most raw.
- Ow.
- The killer could be listening to those tapes.
- Could be anyone.

Marcus: Serial killers love talking about themselves. The more Neil talks, the more likely he'll incriminate himself.

Ray: Looks like the Broken Hearts Killer strikes again.
Marcus: Stop calling him that.
Ray: Why? What's the problem?
Marcus: Because you never know when something stupid like that's gonna stick.
Ray: Come on. That'll never stick.
[Cut to newspaper headline about the BHK]

Dan: The school called. Apparently, Trixie gave pot brownies to Ms. Benson for Teacher Appreciation Day.
Mazikeen: Well, did she appreciate them?
Dan: No, she didn't, Maze. She didn't appreciate being rushed to the hospital when she couldn't feel her legs anymore.

- How do we know each other?
- You were my mom.
- I know.
- I know.
- Please, have a seat.
- There is, uh, there is so much to explain.

- between these victims.
- Yes, I couldn't agree more, detective.
- After all, the sooner we finish this case, the sooner things can all go back to normal.
- Oof.
- Gnarly.

- Oh, my god. Are they okay?
- They're fine. They're fine.
- Come on. Wakey-wakey, detective.
Dan: Come on, pal.
- Lieutenant Pierce.
Barista: I've got a wake-up for Charlotte.

Lucifer: I know that I've been acting...
Chloe: Insecure. Childish. Possessive.
Lucifer: Well, I was going to say "strangely".

Kay: You could work anywhere... Your office, your home, but you choose to work in this bar. Why?
Marcus: I like a stiff drink?

Chance: We are here with our jilted lover, Lucifer. Now, first off, what is up with that name? "Lucifer"?
[Chuckles]
Chance: You think maybe that is part of the reason that's driving a wedge between you and your old lady?
[Lucifer gives him a death glare]

Chloe: For having this not be your business, you're certainly talking to a lot of people about it.
Lucifer: I know. I just wish people would stop prying

Lucifer: [to Chloe] I've come to the conclusion that no matter what happens with you and Pierce, you and I are partners, Detective, and nothing can come between that.
Marcus: [Literally walks between them] Prepare yourselves, people. This is a different kind of case.

- I put an apb out on him, and...
- We just got a hit.
- He's been spotted in front of the original killer's house.
- Let's go.
- We-well, that's...
- Actually quite promising.

Lucifer: How did you move on from the detective when I showed up and replaced you?
[pause]
Lucifer: And please, don't say improv.
Dan: You didn't replace me.
Lucifer: Well, true, true. I suppose that would imply we're on the same level.

Dan: Are you going through something lately?
Mazikeen: Other than the band, no.

- So, what brings you here?
- Work.
- What you working on?
- A case.
- Well, you want to take a break and buy me a drink?
- Not really, no.

Lucifer: So we're assuming that our killer listens to this juvenile program? We've narrowed our suspects down to anyone who doesn't have satellite radio, and Ms. Lopez.

Lucifer: I hate to break it to you, Cain, but there's only room for one immortal in the detective's life, and that position's already been filled.

- She said mean thing to me and then she go.
- What do you mean, "she go"?
- She take her knives and she move out.
- 0h.
- Thank you, Olga.
- I know. Thank you, though.